West Coast Connection Forum
Elements => Tha Studio => Topic started by: Reef on August 15, 2002, 08:51:21 AM
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Dunno wot to make of this.. lol.. I was ina funny mood when i wrote it.. nothin special.. but drop feedback please..
all i see is 'gangstas' bustin', cussin and fussin/
claimin they 'popped' 9 in a row/
they more interested in the violent content that the way their rhyme flows/
well im here to show thats rhymin fast or slow that we all got somethin we owe/
it could be a life to god or a flame to hell/
but girls poor enough that they using their body to sell/
they cry but the voices echo into the depths of no-where/
cant bare the thought of life anymore/
and she sure that the only way out is suicide/
take a knife to her wrist/
still staring thought the mist into the darkness/
she feels the blade rippin at her bare flesh/
so painful, yet she admits the feelin' is fresh/
shes in distress now, the blood flows down her wrists and hits the pavement/
the rich man stops to watch in amazement/
not taking time to offer help or call for a paramedic/
he stands over he naked body and watches her die/
hes not apologetic, doesnt even pause to cry/
just turns and walks away from reality/
relaises that his buisness has just caused a fataility/
the pimp just laughs and looks for a replacement/
another working-class girl he can lock in the basement/
not feeling no remorse, not knowing the source of death on the streets/
didnt relaising that it was him funding the murderers/
and helpin the dead-beats/
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some of that old ish you're bringin back...
kinda "dark" rhyme... nice reading
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Uppin for feedback
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ayo.. this ryhme is dope, i think it flowed well but i think that your old ryhming scheme works better.. lol.. but i liked the verse!
peace -- indy