West Coast Connection Forum

Lifestyle => Train of Thought => Topic started by: pappy on July 18, 2003, 03:56:02 PM

Title: Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: pappy on July 18, 2003, 03:56:02 PM
on the heels of the kobe bryant admitting he fucks around on his wife.  it just got me thinking why divorce rates are so high in america.  i think it suptin like 60% of new marriages in america end in divorce.  I have my only theories but i wanna hear what every1 else says
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Don Seer on July 18, 2003, 04:05:15 PM
in some cases because of marriages based on all the wrong reasons

people marrying for money
people marrying for status

probably many more..
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Jimmy Cash on July 18, 2003, 04:07:01 PM
i think that it is because of the american dream of marring your high school sweet hart and alot of people are getting married too young, and divorce has become common place where some people are like "if this marriage doesn't work out we could always divorce"
but of course all this is speculation because i have never been married
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Shin on July 18, 2003, 06:41:21 PM
some men even buy their women in asia!
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Trauma-san on July 18, 2003, 09:56:03 PM
I think it's a number of reasons.  The main reason is like homie eluded to, many people, and more so women have changed their attitudes about marriage, some for the good, some for the bad.  In the past, women would stay married through tough times, unfortunately a lot of that was abusive relationships, or the man was messing around.  Today, women (and men) don't even attempt to work out problems in marriage, they just get divorced since it's so commonplace and not even stigmatized in society anymore.  They don't work at marriage, and almost every marriage is going to need a lot of work, a lot of sacrifice, and a lot of pain to make work.  
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Eidolon_Ravi on July 18, 2003, 11:39:09 PM
  Dirvorce rates are high in America bcause ppl have becom more materialistic and individualism has come to the fore.This degradation is not at all sudden but has been gradual and has reached it s culmination point in the present decade... where young ppl. are sitting up and noticing it. If nothin is done to remedy it in the near future.. I see a very bleak hope for the survival of this institution of MARRIAGE.
All the best!!
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Don Jacob on July 19, 2003, 02:04:26 AM
i think the rates are so high in america is because people are growing up too fast , or trying to anyway, and don't know what real love is. my mom owns a day care center, and she's noticed since she's been doing it back in 86' that parents are just getting younger and younger. Also parents are becoming more and more immature and are just making horrible decisions

Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: mauzip on July 19, 2003, 02:14:38 AM
In America people marry too early. They marry between their 18th and 22nd usually. Most couples hardly know each other. Also, you can't really know each other if you haven't lived together yet.

And what somebody already said: young people wanna be more mature than they are.

Ah well, fuck it. I don't even see the use of marriage. It's not that you'll love your partner more just because of a stupid piece of paper.

(please don't attack me on this; I already had many discussions about this)
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: .:DayGoStyLz:. on July 19, 2003, 03:26:16 AM
I think theres just too much stress in the average persons life, and when u combine that with the stress of a relationship, the relationship will be the first to suffer. Like sum1 else said, people get married too young. Its true. They like the fairy tale. Love is important, but it isnt EVERYthing when it comes to a marriage. People would do better to just work on themselves first, get their life in order...get to the point where they are satisfied with themselves first, and THEN they can marry. If u have 2 people who dont even know where they are going individually, then how can they know where they are going as a couple?
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Trauma-san on July 19, 2003, 01:40:09 PM
i think the rates are so high in america is because people are growing up too fast , or trying to anyway, and don't know what real love is. my mom owns a day care center, and she's noticed since she's been doing it back in 86' that parents are just getting younger and younger. Also parents are becoming more and more immature and are just making horrible decisions



I dunno, I don't think early marriage is the problem.  I think what I mentioned was the problem, simply becuase that's the major difference between today and the 50's, when people got married young all the time.  A 16 17 18 year old bride was normal in the 50's., today it's actually usually a little later.  The problem is the attitude that divorce isn't a big thing, and that marriage is for however long you want, not for life.  In the past, people worked and stuck through marriages, through the hard times.  Now you'll play HELL finding a girl that will stand beside youthrough hard times, they're out hte door as soon as something happens they don't like.  
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Jimmy Cash on July 19, 2003, 02:28:50 PM
Now you'll play HELL finding a girl that will stand beside youthrough hard times, they're out hte door as soon as something happens they don't like.  
do i sence a little bitterness? jp
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Trauma-san on July 19, 2003, 02:35:32 PM
Nah, I said YOU'LL play hell, lol.  
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Perfection on July 19, 2003, 06:04:53 PM
People just don't respect marriage like they used to. Before no one would ever dare gettt divroce, but now no one seems to care.
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Quakaveli on July 19, 2003, 08:19:15 PM
Cuz judges smoke so much 8)
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Quakaveli on July 19, 2003, 08:21:44 PM
cuz in our modern high-paced society...love is considered 'romantic love' where u always feel good wit the person and sparks are flying...and after that comes more commitment love, where u have ur ups n downs. Ppl want the adrenaline rush of the first more. Thats MY theory .
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Trauma-san on July 19, 2003, 09:03:22 PM
^^ See, that's ALWAYS been a problem.  Like homie said, it's because everybody don't care about divorces anymore.  Women went a whole 180 with it, before they'd stay no matter what, and let their man beat their ass, now they'll leave their man if he don't take the trash out.  



A Woman Needs A Man, Like A Fish Needs A Bicycle
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: pappy on July 20, 2003, 12:14:00 PM
 heres what i think.  people take love to lightly.  u got people goin out for 2 weeks an than saying they love each other.  how the fuck can u love some1 after 2 weeks.  people cant tell the difference from love an lust now.  You got people saying they love some1 else just to get them even tho they dont really love them.  people dont realize how powerful the word love is.  it should be something deeper but its not now  another reason is sex.  now a days b4 u get married,  it seems like every1 is fuckin every1 an not even thinking about it.  when u get married ur stuck with one person while ur used to a different person every night.  isnt sex supposed to be something special but it isnt anymore. its just another thing.  an a 3rd thing is this whole womans movement.  in the 40's an 50's majority of divorces were filed by the husband not the wife.  Now its the other way around.  Woman have to prove they dont need men even tho they kno they do but they think they have something to prove.
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Woodrow on July 20, 2003, 12:52:37 PM
IMO many people now-a-days get into a relationship without any real world life expierence or relationship skills. They have no idea how to deal with problems when they come up, and no idea how to keep a loving relationship going after the first 6 to 8 months. It's like anything today, people want instant results without putting REAL work into it. Being in a loving and caring relationship takes sacrifice and dedication and hard work. People just expect that if they say "I love you" at the begining and end of the day then the relationship will last and things will be great. IMO people should have to visit a relationship counselor before getting married to make sure it's something they REALLY want to do.

/my 2 cents
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Trauma-san on July 20, 2003, 03:36:41 PM
^^ That's a good point, but again, you guys are all listing things that have ALWAYS been a problem with relationships.  People have ALWAYS gotten married young.  People have ALWAYS gotten married at the drop of the hat.  People have ALWAYS mistaken lust for love.  Tom nailed the only 2 things that are different today as opposed to yesterday; the women's lib movement has made divorce more acceptable, and people are sleeping around so much outside of marriage that there's nothing special about marriage anymore.  
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: lil Bullet from berdoo on July 20, 2003, 06:25:32 PM
well, comparing to what exactly.

if you are comparing the rates for 1800 to 2000 you will have a different reason. If it is 1950-1960 to 1990-2000 you will have also have a different answer. what kind of answer are you looking for exactly? compare 2003 to how many years ago?
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Maestro Minded on July 20, 2003, 06:44:34 PM
for many americans, "getting married" is equal to "moving in", so when one of the partner wanna "move out", they get divorced

i read someplace that a majority of the american population get married twicein a lifetime....

im not sure if its true though
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: pappy on July 20, 2003, 06:54:26 PM
an b4 some1 says this is jus a U.S. thing,  i read somewhere divorce rates were higher in the UK than they are in america
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Trauma-san on July 20, 2003, 09:38:02 PM
Nope, europe is behind us on this one, unfortunately.  4.3 of every 1000 americans get divorced each year, that's #3 in the world.  
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: pappy on July 20, 2003, 09:44:43 PM
Nope, europe is behind us on this one, unfortunately.  4.3 of every 1000 americans get divorced each year, that's #3 in the world.  
i read the us was at 43% an the UK was at 49%.
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Trauma-san on July 20, 2003, 09:49:20 PM
Hmm, actually that's a diff. statistic, you may be right.  The one I saw was divorces PER YEAR, yours is divorces PER MARRIAGE.  
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Trauma-san on July 20, 2003, 09:51:29 PM
LOL OH FUCK You're NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS.


http://www.divorcereform.org/gul.html

America's Divorce Rate, is 54.8 percent.  


SWEDENS IS 54.9 LOL

THIS FUCKER IS UP HERE TALKING SHIT, AND HIS OWN COUNTRY RUNS THE WORLD IN DIVORCE RATES, LOL
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: .:DayGoStyLz:. on July 21, 2003, 04:26:44 AM
Nope, europe is behind us on this one, unfortunately.  4.3 of every 1000 americans get divorced each year, that's #3 in the world.  

damn, id hate to be considered only .3 of a person...
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Maestro Minded on July 21, 2003, 04:34:33 AM
why are you so offensive fucking moron...

if tose stats are valid, its something im definitely not proud of
Title: Re:Why are divorce rates so high
Post by: Trauma-san on July 21, 2003, 07:21:18 AM
Because YOU'RE so offensive, LOL.  You talk all that shit about Americans, and your country's EVEN WORSE, LOL.

So keep on with the "AMericans think this, blah blah blah" and then the shit bites you on the ass.