Author Topic: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old  (Read 560 times)

Z the laidback Virus

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Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« on: November 15, 2007, 09:56:16 AM »
Special Top Meeting
Attendants: Snoop Dogg, Shanté Broadus and MC Eiht
Guest attendants: Dr. Dre, Ice Cube, MC Ren and DJ Quik

Snoop: Yo, whattup peoples? I've gotten you in here 'cause this is some serious business. You see, we should be doing things together to GET things together, you know. Us, the greatest of the coast!
Dre: Which coast, nigga? I'm beyond any coast. Motherfucker, I'm Dre!
Cube: Dre, you jumped ship years ago, yeah. Where were you when I was making 'Laugh Now, Cry Later'? Sleeping in your studio, I suppose?
Snoop: Wait! Relax! Let us be cool with each other. I'm Bigg Snoop D-O-double-G and you've got to listen to me! Now, let me start by annoucing who's here and why. First of, I'm here because I'm Snoop D-O-double-G, King of the Westcoast...
Cube...and like any royal you have done little to claim your title.
Snoop: I've done everything I could for the westcoast and you know that!
Cube: Yeah, I know you went to No Limit for the westcoast and then later you released garbage R&G for the westcoast and now you're ripping your verses on 'Sexual Eruption' for the westcoast.Right?
Snoop:...stop...stop...stop harassing me! I'm the King and that's it! Now, to get back to things: Cube, you're here because you're like the secondary King of the Coast, you're like my favourite fan and because you are one ugly ass motherfucker, the west needs someone looking bad to make itself look good, you feel me?
Dre: You mean like I came up with you back in the day? Honestly, Calvin, you looked like a starving rat and you've never looked better then you did then.
Snoop: Umm...right...yeah, Dre! That's it. Bad to the bone, that's me! Snoop D-O-double-bad-to-the-bone!
Cube: Bad to the bone isn't very deep in your case. But proceed!
Snoop: Right, well, I've gotten Dre too, of course because he is the biggest hiphop artist alive, after me. Oh and despite only meeting me some years into his career, he was doing well before that too. I've also invited Quik, because he knows like no one else how to sellout and exchange your image for the faint hope of a promising career as a no-talent southern artist. MC Eiht is here too because he always has these intelligent remarks and he's very smart.
MC Eiht: G Yeah
Snoop:...and I also have invited Ren but he isn't here yet. He's invited because he threatened to kill me if I did not. We need that kind of attitude. Ah, there he is!
*MC Ren enters the room*
Snoop: Yo, Ren!
Ren: Shut the fuck up you skinny ass nigga!I'mma murder ya grandmama!
Dre: Hello Ren
Ren: Fuck the fuck up, fucking gaylord fuckface! I'm spill my semen over your overrated keyboards!
MC Eiht: G Yeah
Quik: Whattup Ren?
Ren: Who the motherfuck might you two be, cocksuckers? I'mma stick my dick in ya mouth and shoot you with a chainsaw!
Cube: Yo, Ren, wassup?
Ren: Oh, hello Cube. Isn't it a lovely day out there today? You know, California sunshine and all. It's just great, I'm feeling like a little girl at the beach today!
Snoop: Right, I want to organise you people into working together for the westcoast. It'll be great, me being the King and you all the almost-Kings!
MC Eiht: G Yeah
Snoop: So, first off, I'm thinking we should get to make a compilation album.
Cube: You mean like NWA? But featuring Quik and Eiht too?
Snoop: Exactly!
Dre: I ain't got time for that.
Quik: Well, let's all move to the south!
Ren: Why the fuck should we move to the fucking south? I'mma release my trigga in yo nostril, nigga!
Quik: I'm America's most complete artist and I moved to the south....to drop wack rhymes over flimsy beats. It sells like hell, in the south. That's when you actually get things released of course, so I'm not sure yet.
Snoop: Yeah,that's a good idea! Can you make southern style beats, Dre?
Dre:I ain't got time for that.
Snoop: That's a problem. Well, what if we make this great westcoaster track on Detox, Dre?
MC Eiht: G Yeah
Cube: That might work, you're busy making Detox, right?
Dre: Detox? I ain't got time for that.
Quik: I'll fix that,I'm a fixer you know!
Ren: I'll fix you a porcupine up in your asshole and then pull it out with Dre's teeth, motherfucker! How's that,nigga?
Dre: I ain't got time for that either.
Snoop: Right. This is getting nowhere people. What shall we do now?
Cube: I'm thinking we should make this Detox-track together, you know, just us. I'm sure Dre will give us a call when he's ready and made a great beat for that.
Dre: I ain't..'
Snoop: Shut up! Shut up! I can't take it anymore! This is bullshit! This is no way to treat a King! This is no way to treat Snoop D-O-double G! I'm the boss, and y'all gotta listen!
Ren: No
Snoop:...
*Snoops falls of his chair, and coils into a foetus-position with his thumb in his mouth*
Dre: Always been a crybaby, that Calvin.
Cube: Right, I'm outta here if that nigga can't keep himself together.
MC Eiht: G yeah
Quik: I'm off to the south!
Ren: Yo Snoopy, tell RBX I said hi, motherfucker. I'mma kick your skinny ass!
*Ren kicks Snoop*

END OF MEETING




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K.Dub

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Re: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« Reply #1 on: November 15, 2007, 10:30:09 AM »
"Dre: I ain't got time for that!"

LOOOL ;D

kemizt
 

debosse

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Re: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« Reply #2 on: November 15, 2007, 10:47:26 AM »
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!  Homie u are making my dayz out here in Iraq.  Keep it comin.  This is classic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

drakeshakenbake

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Re: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« Reply #3 on: November 15, 2007, 11:35:33 AM »
haha.. thats some funny shit man! keep it coming
 

J$crILLa

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Re: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« Reply #4 on: November 15, 2007, 12:42:11 PM »
it got real funny when MC REN came in the room.....

fuckin great

crip-hop

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Re: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« Reply #5 on: November 15, 2007, 01:01:09 PM »
keep it comin g,

Dre: Detox? I ain't got time for that

Ren: Fuck the fuck up, fucking gaylord fuckface! I'm spill my semen over your overrated keyboards!

u make my day

GYEAH 8)
 

k1000

Re: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« Reply #6 on: November 16, 2007, 08:57:56 AM »
another piece of good comedy !  :laugh: props
 

Lazar

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Re: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« Reply #7 on: November 16, 2007, 09:06:53 AM »
G-Yeah, you coming with another classic  ;D Props

"I'm America's most complete artist and I moved to the south....to drop wack rhymes over flimsy beats. It sells like hell, in the south."

Haha, that was good. And the Dre line "I ain´t got time for that"  is the shit  ;)


Z the laidback Virus

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Re: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« Reply #8 on: November 16, 2007, 09:18:47 AM »
Ok, people. I'm glad you're all liking it again. I took a chance here in branching out to include Ren, Cube and Dre and not using Kurupt or any of the others this time. There's a bunch of other people I hope to include in the next one...
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Sosna

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Re: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« Reply #9 on: November 16, 2007, 10:12:51 AM »
Geah!! ;D MC Ren has destroyed everybody... 8) Props 2 U, man...

Hmm... I think dat Snoop is really pitiful in ya' stories - he ain't funny, 'coz his character is so close 2 da truth... :-X

Philip1123

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Re: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« Reply #10 on: November 16, 2007, 10:26:31 AM »
Awesome, just like part one!!!
On the next meeting there should be some new guests:
Warren G (he's quite a character - with his laid back attitude)
E-40 - Another West Coast legend who sold out and went down south to work with Lil Jon. He MUST be on the next meeting
Yukmouth and Crooked I - Two great artists that do a 100 things, promote their so-called label, scream Regime and COB but never seem to release an album. Their album release date is always pushed back!
The Game - well you know he's a must have on that meeting. Only name dropping and kissing Dre's ass.
Suga Free - a funna ass pimp, and a real one at that, not like wanna-be Snoop
Too Short - another legend
 

Z the laidback Virus

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Re: Another day at Doggystyle Records: Out with the old
« Reply #11 on: November 16, 2007, 12:25:26 PM »
Ok, people. Thanks for the feedback.
So far, you have come up with a bunch of other people that you'd want to get included, both in this thread and in the last one. Some of those people have been on my mind too, others haven't. Just wait for the next installment and the one after and the one after that, and so on.

 I hope to make quite a few of these sketches, but my main concern is to keep things from getting repetitive. That means that I'll probably stop writing them once I can not come up with enough diversity between characters or when I use the same things over and over again. One must call it quits when things are still going well, right?

I expect to make perhaps 4 or 5 others, but we'll see.

Anyways, thanks for the positive feedback...oh and the props. Keep up giving me those props.  ;)

Oh and another thing, when you read them and you like them, please write a reply. Otherwise, most of my readers will be ghost readers and I might not realise how much my threads are appreciated. You can of course write criticisms too, I could use those to improve upon my writing.

As for the Snoop character, yes, he is pitiable. He is of course a great exaggeration of the real Snoop with a focus on the negative. I do like Snoop in reality, honest. :)
Z knows about ALL your inner conflicts..