when all i can think of...

[TraceOneInfinite Flat Earther 96']

do i hate u
no i dont know
its just when im with u
u know
i just cant grow
its just sad u know
cause u insist on my presence
but your presence presents
to me nothin but regrets
they say i shudnt feel this way
that its all okay and such
but i cant feel your love
or sensitivity in the touch
cant feel anything
just an aversion to my being
a great longing for a past existence
thats gone in the sands of time
oppurtunities i missed
that i cant get off my mind
its better when im not with u
then im not tortured so much
when i see u i see my failures
and the days when i just lost touch
i wish for those days back
so it wouldnt have to be this way
but all i see is regrets
everytime i see your face
god show me away
to get away from this deep dark feeling
but the only way is away from you
and even that aint possible..seeing..
seeing that if i abandon you
well then id feel giulty for that
so that would mean more regrets
up on top of that
all i can think is about doing this life over
every time you tell me to come over
and everytime i think to visit
these same thoughts visit
no matter what you say
or what i do
all i feel is deep regret
whenever im around you
ive looked for solutions
to this massive confusion
but it hurts my brain to think
so i try to shrink
the problem
and forget temporarily
then i see its ugly face
demons in dreams so scary
so i cherish the thoughts
when u dont visit
its just that period of my life
thats a bottomless whole unlimited
you remind me of that
and now i cant stop writin
why is it my own brain
that i just keep fightin
God give me thoughts not filled
with your presence
cause all i can think of is regrets unendin

[QuietTruth]

That was nice, esp. the beginning half.