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Author Topic: Have you ever had that someone  (Read 1312 times)

PinkTowelGirl

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Have you ever had that someone
« on: December 11, 2001, 08:55:02 AM »
Who care so much... it hurt......

 My first year in high school was one of the most hardest periods in my life, I had to deal with alot of things that most 14 and 15 shouldn't have too. I was helping raising two kids that i love more then life, My mom was gone and well i always felt that i had to take care of my dad. High school did not make like much easier for me either. I was popular in Middle school, Most people liked me. i was friendly and happy. When i go to high school, the first week of school was cool, Meeting new people and hanging out with the old ones. Dispite my home life, school was my escape from it all. But i found a great love, The love of my life NJROTC (Naval Junior Reserve Officers Training Corps) I couldn't wait for the first day, that was were all suppose to dress in or uniforms. I love the marching, PT (Physical Training), and the great joy of my the Armed Drill Team. About the 3rd week of the school year, was the big week for me. My friend did not know that I was a Cadet in the program and that i almost worship the rules of the Cadet Field Manual. This was a new light for me, I was learning things most people would never try to learn. Finually the day came were it was the first Uniform day for all freashman. I was so excited, Little did i know it would change my life forever and the way my supposed friend saw me too.
  I walked on campus like every other day, this time things would be different. I never took the time to notice that no one liked the Cadets in ROTC. They were loser and now i was lable as one too. I walked up to my friends that i always hung out with. They looked at me, Then one let out a comment that hurt me more then anything. "How can you like that shit" she smerked at me. Following that comment was a few minutes of ridicule. My new found love was not the best thing on earth. As the school year went on, I became more and more interested in the program. Spending all my time and energy in the ROTC setting. I became simi close the Master Gunns the ROTC Instuctor. He was funny, mean, nice, caring, and curle all rolled into one. But to this day i concider him a close friend.
 Towards march of my 9th grade, Life seem to be getting harder and harder. My grades were good and ROTC was my life, even though i had lost all my friends and trying to figure out who i was. One day I thought I lost total control of my emotions, life, spirit and mind. Class was dismissed but that day that moment change my life forever. I didn't move, I sat back down after i standing at attention for a few mintues. almost crying i just sat there. Master Gunns walk up to me and ask me the question that i see as my life saver. "Mija, Are you ok" in a soft voice i whispered. "I want to kill myself, i want to feel pain" He gave me a wierd look, then ask my to repeat what i just said. I remember getting up from my seat. and walking out the class room door without saying a word.
 Within the next hour or so, i was call into the crisis concelor. He explained to me that a teacher reported that I had made a comment that i was going to kill myself. I didn't know what to say, i started crying and told her that i didn't mean to cuase such a stur up. I told her i was sorry and left. Anger ran though my body. How could master gunns do that to me. How could he turn me like that. After i cooled down i started to feel bad. I remember having the razor blades in my pocket, I was ready to do this. I felt to courage to do what was on my mind for months now. I had no friends so who would really miss i thought.
  After school i talk to Master Gunns. I told him that i felt that this time i am going to do it. I cry on his shoulder. I couldn't control it. I was going to kill myself, But then he told me something that change that forever. "if you were to kill your self, I would miss you. I love you Kiddo and your Dad loves you too. It would hurt alot of people who really care about you." he made me think about my family and the few friends i had in ROTC. That day i made a promise to him that i would alway keep and never take it back. No matter if i ever see him after i graduate or i do. This promise was meant to be keeped and between two friends that learned from each other. I promise him that i would never take my life. I would never do anything to hurt myself. This promise i have now kept for 4 years now. Everyday when i wake up, i think about what the little things we do and say can change a person forever.  

My challenge for you is this.....

Anytime from now till new years, Try to make a life changing difference in someone life. Remember it can only be a few words and nothing more... thats my challenge for anyone willing to take it    Peace
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=[Euthanasia]=

Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #1 on: December 11, 2001, 09:05:09 AM »
Damn pink, thats some heavy shiz. Is that about you? I'm guessing it is. I've always been told that nothing is so bad that it's worth killing yourself over, & I totally believe that.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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I think that if you take one of the 'O's' out of 'Good' it's 'God', if you add a 'D' to 'Evil' it's the 'Devil'. I think some cool motherfucker sat down a long time ago and said 'let's figure out a way to control motherfuckers'.
 

PinkTowelGirl

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Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #2 on: December 11, 2001, 09:16:33 AM »

Quote

Damn pink, thats some heavy shiz. Is that about you? I'm guessing it is. I've always been told that nothing is so bad that it's worth killing yourself over, & I totally believe that.


I believe that now... I just think of all the good that i have brought to other and what others mean to me... I am a better person since my 9th grade year... I learn to take things one step at a time... nothing is easy in life... thanks for the reply  :)
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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=[Euthanasia]=

Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #3 on: December 11, 2001, 09:21:17 AM »

Quote



I believe that now... I just think of all the good that i have brought to other and what others mean to me... I am a better person since my 9th grade year... I learn to take things one step at a time... nothing is easy in life... thanks for the reply  :)


N/P  :) Glad you've realised that life is worth living. There's always something to live for, family especially. Just think, I wouldn't of known you, I would've missed out on your sweet little posts  ;D
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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I think that if you take one of the 'O's' out of 'Good' it's 'God', if you add a 'D' to 'Evil' it's the 'Devil'. I think some cool motherfucker sat down a long time ago and said 'let's figure out a way to control motherfuckers'.
 

Don Seer

Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #4 on: December 11, 2001, 09:22:25 AM »
awww its all love  :D
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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PinkTowelGirl

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Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #5 on: December 11, 2001, 09:24:26 AM »

Quote



N/P  :) Glad you've realised that life is worth living. There's always something to live for, family especially. Just think, I wouldn't of known you, I would've missed out on your sweet little posts  ;D


Awww!!! you are such a sweetie.. i am glad that you like my posts... hit me up on AIM or MSN chief_unique@hotmail.com sometime  :-*
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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=[Euthanasia]=

Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #6 on: December 11, 2001, 09:25:52 AM »

Quote

awww its all love  :D


LOL, damn straight, we like family here, right  ;D
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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I think that if you take one of the 'O's' out of 'Good' it's 'God', if you add a 'D' to 'Evil' it's the 'Devil'. I think some cool motherfucker sat down a long time ago and said 'let's figure out a way to control motherfuckers'.
 

=[Euthanasia]=

Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #7 on: December 11, 2001, 09:26:44 AM »

Quote



Awww!!! you are such a sweetie.. i am glad that you like my posts... hit me up on AIM or MSN chief_unique@hotmail.com sometime  :-*


;)
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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I think that if you take one of the 'O's' out of 'Good' it's 'God', if you add a 'D' to 'Evil' it's the 'Devil'. I think some cool motherfucker sat down a long time ago and said 'let's figure out a way to control motherfuckers'.
 

Don Seer

Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #8 on: December 11, 2001, 09:26:53 AM »
ya  ;)

« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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=[Euthanasia]=

Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #9 on: December 11, 2001, 09:29:23 AM »
Tis' tha season afterall  :)
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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I think that if you take one of the 'O's' out of 'Good' it's 'God', if you add a 'D' to 'Evil' it's the 'Devil'. I think some cool motherfucker sat down a long time ago and said 'let's figure out a way to control motherfuckers'.
 

PinkTowelGirl

  • Guest
Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #10 on: December 11, 2001, 09:32:18 AM »

Quote

Tis' tha season afterall  :)


Lol      ;D
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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=[Euthanasia]=

Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #11 on: December 11, 2001, 09:37:26 AM »
Tra la la la la, la la la la  ;D
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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I think that if you take one of the 'O's' out of 'Good' it's 'God', if you add a 'D' to 'Evil' it's the 'Devil'. I think some cool motherfucker sat down a long time ago and said 'let's figure out a way to control motherfuckers'.
 

Don Seer

Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #12 on: December 11, 2001, 09:53:09 AM »
heh, yeah....

deck the halls with... wtf.. hold up.. we nukin pinkies thread here! *puts shit back on track*

the truths written up top, if u read between the lines, some people never figure some of this stuff out, and some do it too late.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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PinkTowelGirl

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Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #13 on: December 11, 2001, 10:01:21 AM »

Quote

heh, yeah....

deck the halls with... wtf.. hold up.. we nukin pinkies thread here! *puts shit back on track*

the truths written up top, if u read between the lines, some people never figure some of this stuff out, and some do it too late.


lol... yeah sometime it is fun to get off track tough... but you are right.. some people learn to late... i am lucky that i had a person in my life who help me find self love and self respect... even though i acted goofy all the time ;D
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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Dogg_Pound_Gangsta

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Re: Have you ever had that someone
« Reply #14 on: December 11, 2001, 10:21:30 AM »
baby dont cry ya gotta keep ya head up, even when the road is hard neva give up.


Peace
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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