Author Topic: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to live 4  (Read 591 times)

HBKid_Jr

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Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to live 4
« on: November 29, 2001, 08:20:35 AM »
I guess it hit me last night,  when i asked for a raise at work.  After askin several times about it an be lead to believe it was only a matter of time they told me they cant give it to me b/c business is so bad.  It was than I realized nutin ever goes my way,  i have few positives in my life,  very few things bring me happiness.  I realize i am going know where in life,  b/c of my grades,  i just didnt give a fuck about school,  a smart kid that just underacheived. I dont know what i didn wrong,  maybe it was that i convinced myself school was useless or tha desperate attempt for attention an actin like an idiot on purpose just for some cheap laughs an than we people called me an idiot i started to believe.  I have very few friends,  I dont want any b/c of tha fact every1 i considered my best friend pretty much ditched me or stabed me in tha back in some way or another.  So Why bother gettin friends when its just goin happen again.  And when it comes to girls,  if i can quote Kane,  "tha only time you had pussy was when pussy had you",  i aint even kissed a fuckin girl,  they dont even adknowledge my exsitance,  but hey its my fault cuz im too shy an to much of bitch to even talk to a decent lookin girl.  My parents are seperated an my dad is always in severe pain an he is gettin a surgrey to try an rid himself of it but if that dont work i dont he has to much time left.  There's a lot of little shit that makes me feel this way bein poor is one of them,  like crooked i said,  "i hope i can find some happiness to breathe again",  i aint surcidle but i do wish i would die,  its kinda funny thing,   last year durin health class we were studyin suicide an we were talkin about what are some signs of a suicidle person about 75% of stuff applied to me.  Anyways i just thought i let ya'll know cuz i got nutin better to do,  it just feels like i did something wrong to deserve this life,  i did nutin wrong an yet i have to suffer for it,  im lonely as fuck,  i hate life wit a passion,  i just feel like i have nothin to live for.  If any of ya'll feel bad about yourselves,  just think,  atleast im not that bitch tom
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

Trauma-san

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #1 on: November 29, 2001, 08:24:56 AM »
Man, I Got The Answer For You, But You Won't Listen To Me, LOL.

You Need To Go To Church.  Man, I Go Every Week, It's Good For Several Things.  I Go To A Youth Ward, Where Everybody's In Their 20's And Single, They Have Ones For All Ages, Too... You Can Meet A Lot Of Cool People There, Plus You Feel Good About It Because You're Learning About God, Plus, There's toonnnnns Of Honeys That Go To Church, And Not As Many Guys.  So, Some Girl Will Think You're Cute And You'll Hook Up, I Guarantee It.  

Plus, Going To Church Will Help You See That Your Life Does Have Purpose, You Just Haven't Realized It yet.  Hang In There, It'll Get Better.  
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

AlerG

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #2 on: November 29, 2001, 08:37:33 AM »
yes tom, let trauma lead you into the cult of all cults, to a place where you are baptized before you have a chance to give your side on whether or not you want to be part of that group. look at most people that go to church, they are totally gased. i suggest you gather up somes balls and a a chick out, worst thing she can do is say no, fuck it you can ask 2000 girls out in a day, there is no limit, you may find just the one you need to take yourself out of this misery. as for your father, i wish the best for him. and as for your job, while workin at your job when you are off look around and explore your options, don't quit your job until you find better. also, start goin to parties and conversating, honestly alcohol does help. as for school, you made that choice to fuck around, and noone can really offer you any advice because you chose your road there...holler back, if any of that stuff works, peace.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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Liquid-Dogg

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #3 on: November 29, 2001, 09:34:39 AM »
Listen to AlerG
Church ain't the way forward these dayz.
Also, alcohol, like he said, does help. Even if u get wit a girl when u both pissed at a party, u'll get more confidence, jus try not to be really pissed.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

Murrow

Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #4 on: November 29, 2001, 09:49:37 AM »

Quote

I guess it hit me last night,  when i asked for a raise at work.  After askin several times about it an be lead to believe it was only a matter of time they told me they cant give it to me b/c business is so bad.  It was than I realized nutin ever goes my way,  i have few positives in my life,  very few things bring me happiness.  I realize i am going know where in life,  b/c of my grades,  i just didnt give a fuck about school,  a smart kid that just underacheived. I dont know what i didn wrong,  maybe it was that i convinced myself school was useless or tha desperate attempt for attention an actin like an idiot on purpose just for some cheap laughs an than we people called me an idiot i started to believe.  I have very few friends,  I dont want any b/c of tha fact every1 i considered my best friend pretty much ditched me or stabed me in tha back in some way or another.  So Why bother gettin friends when its just goin happen again.  And when it comes to girls,  if i can quote Kane,  "tha only time you had pussy was when pussy had you",  i aint even kissed a fuckin girl,  they dont even adknowledge my exsitance,  but hey its my fault cuz im too shy an to much of bitch to even talk to a decent lookin girl.  My parents are seperated an my dad is always in severe pain an he is gettin a surgrey to try an rid himself of it but if that dont work i dont he has to much time left.  There's a lot of little shit that makes me feel this way bein poor is one of them,  like crooked i said,  "i hope i can find some happiness to breathe again",  i aint surcidle but i do wish i would die,  its kinda funny thing,   last year durin health class we were studyin suicide an we were talkin about what are some signs of a suicidle person about 75% of stuff applied to me.  Anyways i just thought i let ya'll know cuz i got nutin better to do,  it just feels like i did something wrong to deserve this life,  i did nutin wrong an yet i have to suffer for it,  im lonely as fuck,  i hate life wit a passion,  i just feel like i have nothin to live for.  If any of ya'll feel bad about yourselves,  just think,  atleast im not that bitch tom


Tom, we were about 90% alike about a year and a half ago.  I went through a lotta shit that had me thinkin a lot.  When I got to high school I changed and am a different person.  When I get down homie, music is what I turn to.  It helps me so much.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #5 on: November 29, 2001, 09:57:09 AM »
Quote
i aint surcidle but i do wish i would die


maaan dont say shit like that!

Quote
Church ain't the way forward these dayz.
Also, alcohol, like he said, does help


ok thats your opinion man, but I could never live & talk like that. Church DOES HELP. man i completely agree with trauma, let me quote him real quik, Going To Church Will Help You See That Your Life Does Have Purpose, You Just Haven't Realized It yet!!
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #6 on: November 29, 2001, 10:01:59 AM »
Quote
When I get down homie, music is what I turn to.  It helps me so much.


exactly homie
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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AlerG

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #7 on: November 29, 2001, 10:05:25 AM »
if you go to a party and have a couple drinks and let yourself go you'll probably have a real good time and really enjoy yourself...if you're lucky enough to pick up a girl, it's a bonus...just go out and have some fun, wake up happy you woke...you gotta have things to look foward to, peace.




oh yeah, and really listen to music, even smoke a joint and relax, don't stress so much, peace.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #8 on: November 29, 2001, 10:21:57 AM »
AlerG, You Have The IQ Of An 8 Year Old, And It's Assholes Like You Who Make Jokes About Somebody's Life That Are The Reason I Won't Be Posting Here Anymore.  Bigger And Better Things.

« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

HBKid_Jr

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #9 on: November 29, 2001, 10:26:06 AM »

Quote

if you go to a party and have a couple drinks and let yourself go you'll probably have a real good time and really enjoy yourself...if you're lucky enough to pick up a girl, it's a bonus...just go out and have some fun, wake up happy you woke...you gotta have things to look foward to, peace.





oh yeah, and really listen to music, even smoke a joint and relax, don't stress so much, peace.

well tha thing is,  i dont get invited to partys,  weed works sometimes,  i dont smoke a lot but when i do about 50% of tha time i get extremely paranoid.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

AlerG

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #10 on: November 29, 2001, 11:14:47 AM »
why you trippin trauma?????
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lee

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #11 on: November 29, 2001, 11:15:04 AM »
aren't u only 16 ?
I would'nt advise going to church like trauma said .. thats a bit ... um ... u won't meet women there .. lol
Join something u like say i dunno ... if ur into music join a class to learn music .. or join some kinda a class like that ... u might find a girl that has something in common with u ...
u could change schools if u want .. u could meet new people there ....
anyway ur life will pick up when ur older ... u should try and travel and stuff .... u know u get student visas when ur like 18 ...  ;D

so think positvely ... and i have to say this ..

NO church and "youth ward" ... thats sounds a bit um ... lol  ;D
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AlerG

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #12 on: November 29, 2001, 11:18:05 AM »
^ exactly
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Joachim

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #13 on: November 29, 2001, 11:34:33 AM »

Quote


well tha thing is,  i dont get invited to partys


Throw your own then bro, and throw the biggest ma'fuckin party your hood ever seen, then the women will love you homie...
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #14 on: November 29, 2001, 11:48:08 AM »

Quote

yes tom, let trauma lead you into the cult of all cults, to a place where you are baptized before you have a chance to give your side on whether or not you want to be part of that group. look at most people that go to church, they are totally gased.


Sorry, Maybe I Shouldn't Have Tripped, But I Just Sat Right There And Told you I Go To Church Every Week, And You Said I Was "Gased" And A Member Of A Cult.  You Don't Know Me, And You Don't Know 1 Person That goes To My Church.  Your Sarcasm Pisses Me Off.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #15 on: November 29, 2001, 11:49:23 AM »

Quote

NO church and "youth ward" ... thats sounds a bit um ... lol  ;D


Ignorant Statement.  One Day, You Should Grow Up And Decide To Make Up Your Own Mind About Things Instead Of What They "Sound Like".  That's The Most Ridiculous Statement That's Been Said On This Board In It's 2 Years.  
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

lee

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #16 on: November 29, 2001, 12:59:36 PM »
well theres this religous family down the road from me ... they're all a bit sad and go to youth groups in the community centre and go to mass like every week ... They are all nutcases as well
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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #17 on: November 29, 2001, 01:06:40 PM »
trauma is 100% ON  THE DOT!

on onsite!

you don't even have to go to a catholic church, christian churches sound more for you man it's more (how can i put it) chill....yeah theres ALOT of whoopy white people that go there but it's amazing how nice the people there are. My mom's catholic and the church she goes to is hella strict and the people there are asses plus i feel like scum more than a child of god, but i go to a regualr christian church and its amazing how nice people are there and sometimes in church you get this ovewelming feeling of love (not lust love) but the love you have for family and shit....you should find  a good church and hook up with a youth group, sounds like something that would work for you
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »


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bLaDe HeLi[X]

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #18 on: November 29, 2001, 01:18:11 PM »
Yo homie tom, man like trauma said, goto church, believe in God, talk to ppl there, u'll make gud friends, and try improvin yo self confidence.  Your a funny guy, i think ure pretty cool, dont try to be like anyone else, find your self, be yourself ... listn to trauma, and throw a party, call yo peeps, call yo peeps homiez ... talk to ppl.  Girls, dun be shy just go up to them and talk to em, she wont tell ya to get lost if u say Hi, and act yourself, and kind n shit, just keep talkin, talk to everyone, be ure self, fuck all, they dont exist, u and da girls n yo homiez, they da only ones who o ndis earth, fuck all
Get into sum sports/music etc, workout, play hard sports, not only r they fun but they r great for your body and mind, it relaxes you as well ... so do sum sports or execersize
Take yo mind of things, work on a project, try writin rhymes, actually ignoring everyone else and listn and try to understand
Take it easy, fuck weed, fuck alkahol .. open up, change yo brain patterz, they have been chnaged wid ppl telling you your stupid, aint worth shit .. look at em, they look sick n ignorent ... open up, do sum sport ot work out, and think bout who u really are, your a funny, cool guy, .. talk to chicks, just talk to em as normal homiez, be cool, be yourself, heck if u cant kiss em, atleast u'll have a girl as a friend, sumone to talk to ... and maby u mite even get one homie

peace

 -{bLaDe}
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #19 on: November 29, 2001, 01:57:13 PM »
Reading that shit hits me close Tom... why? Because I was in that same situation. I don't believe in GOD so there is no way its going to happen to me....  but I hated school, had few friends, girls weren't for me.... but I wasn't as down as you were... I had friends stab me from behind and I would wonder why not make new ones... I felt like an outkast.... then I turned on Snoop Dogg..... reading your shit is real cool because you relate you're feelings to lyrics in songs... I listened to " Still A G Thang "  where he says

" Stay True To What You Do and Don't Be Ashamed "

to most listeners, they won't take it seriously, but with me... It was like a light bulb, I hated what I did... how people looked at me so I went out to make my life better and it worked.... the whole time staying true to me and only me... shit now I don't need to worry about all the things...  I got a life again, girls, I still dont' have a g/f, but shit, at least we are fucking hanging out with the ladies... we have fun times with them... i speak my mind, i have respect, its all good... just don't say shit like you want to die... i felt like death was the way out until one of my classmates killed themself.... after someone does that everyone thinks " how could we have helped "  ....don't put that on people.... one thing you gotta remember, is this.... you won't get respect until you respect yourself... if you're ashamed of yourself, you don't have respect for yourself........ once you get that...  the peices fall into place... and damn, be assertive... don't just wait for things to happend, make them happen... call up people, go to social events... do those and you'll do good, trust me on that... just stay alive

-Big BpG
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #20 on: November 29, 2001, 02:05:56 PM »
Exactly what Trauma said. You can smoke, drink, party all you want but there is still no purpose in that. It just works for sometime.


And I ain't naming any names cause I don't have the time nor patience to have someone beefin with me but if you don't know what the fuck your talking about than don't say shit.
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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #21 on: November 29, 2001, 02:48:09 PM »
damn tom187um, i kinda feel how you feel now cuz i don't really hang much like i used to and i have some family issues myself but you gotta hang in there, there's TON of people who goes through the same shit you do, i mean its just a matter of time to really get used to it because i am since my life's been hell mostly every single day since lifes a bitch and you die.....theres nothing anyone can do about it since peeps go through struggles eventually i mean in high school i was basically living the "fast life" if you can put it that way but ever since i graduated from high school it hasn't been the same since EVERYBODY MOVES ON WITH THEIR OWN LIFE cuz you can't be the same forever you know......i mean you just have to have hope and hope that happiness will eventually find you or i guess you could try to look for it but i know its hard as fuck to do that so you just gotta think positive. listen to trauma man i used to go to youth groups too and its really fun and very positive and its cool since you can find a lot of NICE PEOPLE which is really hard to do these days and its fun since you go watch movies at theaters, go bowling and shit like that, i remember we went skiing during the winter which was really fun but one thing, i don't know about fine girls though, at least not in the church i went to, haha well anyways, i hope that you can recover man seriously even though i don't know you, you want to chat about life, hit me up on aim ;D
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

Doggystylin

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #22 on: November 29, 2001, 04:04:49 PM »
Tom dont listen to these assholes and just listen to Trauma, hes onpoint, and listen to those who agree with him, cause religion is the way man, God is the only one that you should want help from, just pray and listen to a lot of bone thugs,Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Buddist, whatever, it just matters that you believe in God.


hey man you know i have women problems too, i know how it is, lol, it sucks dick, i get all sad at times too, but ya gotta keep ya head up


ahh leave the bone thugs part out, lol, sorry
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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #23 on: November 29, 2001, 05:02:53 PM »

Quote

Tom dont listen to these assholes and just listen to Trauma, hes onpoint, and listen to those who agree with him, cause religion is the way man, God is the only one that you should want help from, just pray and listen to a lot of bone thugs,Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Buddist, whatever, it just matters that you believe in God.


hey man you know i have women problems too, i know how it is, lol, it sucks dick, i get all sad at times too, but ya gotta keep ya head up


ahh leave the bone thugs part out, lol, sorry


I'm not trying to start beef, but what you said is just bullshit... yes we got our own opinions, but if someone would have told me that during my times of trouble I would have probably would have beat them... I don't believe in God and I have my reasons... to me, you gotta find it in yourself before you find it in anything else.... if you find GOD as you're way, then you take GOD and make him part of you're daily life... you take him to the extreme... especially in times of need... look at people who took GOD and put him on a level above everything else.... what they did is take two planes and crash them into the World Trade Centers... now this is just when it gets to the extreme... many of my friends believe in god, but they don't need him for help... they use the bible as guidance but not as a cure to emotional problems.... you gotta find it in yourself before you find it anything else, its starts with the individual and not the material

-Big BpG
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »

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Doggystylin

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Re: Tha cold realization that I have i nutin to li
« Reply #24 on: November 29, 2001, 05:12:34 PM »

Quote



I'm not trying to start beef, but what you said is just bullshit... yes we got our own opinions, but if someone would have told me that during my times of trouble I would have probably would have beat them... I don't believe in God and I have my reasons... to me, you gotta find it in yourself before you find it in anything else.... if you find GOD as you're way, then you take GOD and make him part of you're daily life... you take him to the extreme... especially in times of need... look at people who took GOD and put him on a level above everything else.... what they did is take two planes and crash them into the World Trade Centers... now this is just when it gets to the extreme... many of my friends believe in god, but they don't need him for help... they use the bible as guidance but not as a cure to emotional problems.... you gotta find it in yourself before you find it anything else, its starts with the individual and not the material

-Big BpG


ok man, thats you, if thats what you wanna think go ahead, ima be real, i really dont give a shit about what you do. i just dont understand people who dont believe in god, you choose your life, i wanna see where those people who dont believe in god end up. :-/, you can say this is bullshit again, i dont want beef this is just how i feel. peace
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 05:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »