Author Topic: The Bush Speech they didn't want you to hear  (Read 159 times)

Sikotic™

The Bush Speech they didn't want you to hear
« on: September 22, 2001, 06:20:10 PM »
I just found this kinda funny. DON'T TAKE IT PERSONAL, I DIDN'T WRITE IT.

Now that we got that outta the way here it is. Just read the whole thing, I promise its funny:

If I were President George W. Bush's Speechwriter[/u]


Good evening my fellow Americans.

First, I want to pass on my condolences to the
people of New York and all
Americans who are grieving in this tragic time. You can rest assured that
anything and everything that can be done to assure the safety of our country
will be done. This is the greatest country in the
world and we will get
through this trying time. Now is the time for all
people to set aside our petty differences and show the world that no one or
no thing can destroy
the fortitude of the great American people.

And to the people responsible for this tragedy, I
say this: Are you fucking kidding me?
Are the turbans on your heads wrapped too tight? Have you gone too long without a bath?
Do you not know who you are fucking with?
Have you forgotten history? What happened to the
last people that started
fucking around with us? Remember those little yellow bastards over in Japan?
We slapped them all over the Pacific and roasted
about 2 million of them in
their own back yard. In America, that's what we call a big ass barbecue.

And while we were kicking the shit out of the
Japanese, we also kicked
Hitler's ass all the way back to Berlin because
nobody else in Europe could.

Ever seen Texas on a map? Ever wonder why it's so
big? Because we wanted
it that way. Mexico started jacking around with the Alamo and now they cut
our lawns. > See a pattern yet?

Ask your buddy Saddam about fucking with the good 'ole USA. The only
reason he got away the first time is because it's
too hard to shoot someone
when you're doubled over laughing at them. Our
soldiers aren't trained to
laugh and shoot at the same time. Now he couldn't
stop a pack of cub scouts
from taking over his shitty little country.

Trust us, Afghanistan will end up a giant kitty
litter box. Go ahead and try
to hide Bin Laden. There's not a hole deep enough or a mountain high
enough that's going to keep your camel riding asses safe. And quit
threatening us with retaliation from your government because none of you
are going to see next year. We will bomb every inch of any country that
harbors him, his camps and any place that looks and even smells like he
was there. Hell, we might even drop a few bombs on people that have
pissed us off in the past just because we can.

This is America. We kick ass and don't take names. We don't care who
you are. This is what we do. You should have brushed up on your American history before picking a fight with us.
Go ahead, laugh and celebrate in the streets now, but the Tomahawk and Cruise Missiles are
coming and we will roll you up and smoke your sorry asses just like
everyone else who has ever pissed us off like this.

Thank you. And God bless America!

« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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maxi-padz

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Re: The Bush Speech they didn't want you to hear
« Reply #1 on: September 22, 2001, 06:33:19 PM »
LMFAO
hahaha
if it wasn for the tradgedy i wouldn feel bad fo laughen..... :-[
~1~
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

CodeCaine

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Re: The Bush Speech they didn't want you to hear
« Reply #2 on: September 22, 2001, 07:01:21 PM »
check out this email i got last week.......


 September 12, 2001

Dear Osama Bin Laden, Yasser Arafat, and Sadam Hussein, et. al.,

We are pleased to announce that we unequivocally accept your challenge
to an old-fashioned game of whoop-ass.  Now that we understand the rule
that there are no rules, we look forward to playing by them for the
first time.

Since this game is a winner-take-all, we unfortunately are unable to
invite you to join us at the victory celebration.  But rest
assured that we will toast you -- LITERALLY.

While we will admit that you are off to an impressive lead, it is
however now our turn at the plate.

By the way, we will be playing on your court now.

Batter up.

Sincerely,

The 270,000,000 citizens of the United States of America
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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Folks think I'm out of my mind
I'm out of line a lot of times
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Petey Pab

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HBKid_Jr

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Re: The Bush Speech they didn't want you to hear
« Reply #3 on: September 22, 2001, 07:18:41 PM »
Thats tha speech Jorge W.  bush should of said,  that would of went down as one of tha greatest if not tha greatest speech of all-time speeches eva
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

Trauma-san

Re: The Bush Speech they didn't want you to hear
« Reply #4 on: September 22, 2001, 07:34:21 PM »
I Hate To SAy It, And Yall Sympathizers Can Say What You Want About Me, But I %100 Agree With The First Speech.  That's EXACTLY What I Thought When It Happend.  Are They Kidding Us?  

« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

bLaDe

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Re: The Bush Speech they didn't want you to hear
« Reply #5 on: September 23, 2001, 01:11:44 PM »
haha that wuz funny but bout the part of roastin the japanese n shit wuz kinda bad newayz thats wut he should said lol
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
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ROCCY

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Re: The Bush Speech they didn't want you to hear
« Reply #6 on: September 26, 2001, 08:06:15 PM »
LMFAO..................
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

P Nelson

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HAAHAhaAHAH
« Reply #7 on: September 26, 2001, 09:32:09 PM »
YOo ahhaha This shit was juss too crazy and Kane who made me listen to diss DPG SOng "Gangsta Rap" Again, héh well Back to THE topic.. It would shock the whole world and cause an Instant World War 3...
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »
 

Now_Im_Not_Banned

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Re: The Bush Speech they didn't want you to hear
« Reply #8 on: September 30, 2001, 09:03:20 AM »
The Mexicans cuttin are grass was funny...
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 04:00:00 PM by 1034398800 »