How to be a good Democrat

[Woodrow]

How to be a Good Democrat:

1. You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

2. You have to believe that the same teacher, who can't teach 4th graders how to read, is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law abiding Americans are more of a threat, than U.S. nuclear weapons technology, in the hands of Chinese communists.

4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by yuppies driving SUVs.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.

7. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.

8. You have to believe that businesses create oppression, and governments create prosperity.

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists who've never been outside of Seattle do.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

11. You have to believe the NRA is bad, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

12. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

13. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinnem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee or Thomas Edison.

14. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides aren't.

15. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried, is because the right people haven't been in charge.

16. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying in drag, transvestites and bestiality should be constitutionally protected and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

17. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the Chinese is somehow in the best interest of! the United States.

18. And finally, you have to believe that this post is part of a vast right wing conspiracy.

I lifted this from somewhere, but thought it was pretty funny.

[Woodrow]

Let the flame war begin!

[Trauma-san]

the post isn't funny, it's fucking true.  It just exposes democrats for the NUTS that they are, the entire concept fucking baffles me.  How anybody could be stupid enough to believe any of this shit is amazing.  Yes, I truly am smarter than them.  

[JTSimon]

How to be a Good Democrat:

1. You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.
1. Yes...programs for young kids.

2. You have to believe that the same teacher, who can't teach 4th graders how to read, is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
2. Reading should be taught by Kindergarden/1st/2nd grade teachers...hopefully the 4th grade teacher is teaching 6th graders

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law abiding Americans are more of a threat, than U.S. nuclear weapons technology, in the hands of Chinese communists.
3. Nope

4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.
4. Not in the hood

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by yuppies driving SUVs.
5. Whatever you say.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.
6. I believe homosexuality is natural.

7. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.
7. Not true...we believe in capital punishment...and abortion is ok in certain circumstances.

8. You have to believe that businesses create oppression, and governments create prosperity.
8. Yup

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists who've never been outside of Seattle do.
9. lol Seattle area is nature.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.
10. You are in your own world.

11. You have to believe the NRA is bad, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

12. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.
12. Yup

13. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinnem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee or Thomas Edison.
13. Please

14. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides aren't.
14. lol Oregon what you know about minorities?

15. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried, is because the right people haven't been in charge.
15. You can blame the American government for socialism not working.  Thats the last thing they want to see.

16. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying in drag, transvestites and bestiality should be constitutionally protected and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.
16. mmmm let me think whats the difference between sexuality and religion? Lets have a nativity set in every elementary  

17. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the Chinese is somehow in the best interest of! the United States.
17. Umm Isreal yeah welfare uh huh no problem lol rambling to myself.


18. And finally, you have to believe that this post is part of a vast right wing conspiracy.
18. Vast right wing farm community.

I lifted this from somewhere, but thought it was pretty funny.

Thank God...I thought you made this up lol. Next time I'm reading backwards.

[Woodrow]

LOL AT YOU!

[M Dogg™]

How to be a Good Democrat:

1. You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

It's spread by ignorance. Ask any Democrat.

2. You have to believe that the same teacher, who can't teach 4th graders how to read, is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

Hey, teachers are hard working people that are passionite about there job. If you have an issue with them, talk to your school board.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law abiding Americans are more of a threat, than U.S. nuclear weapons technology, in the hands of Chinese communists.

Hold up, we believe in unarming the world. How the hell is currupt politians play in this. Check your own party for curruptions too. Whatever party, crooked people are crooked people

4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.

What the fuck. We just realize that art is an important part of society, and that right now no private business is making money off art. Artist need jobs too you know, they have the right to work doing whatever they want, and in cases like the intercity, mural art is huge in keeping kids off the streets and spray painting businesses.

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by yuppies driving SUVs.

Hey, we are just trying to help, plus SUVs take up a huge amount of oil, which is a non renewable resource, meaning it will run out someday, meaning we need to reserve some instead of wasting it.
6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.

What in the blue hell are you saying. That's nonsense. We just feel homosexuals are people too, and should be respected. Sorry you feel insecure about your sexuality with homosexual rights.
7. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.

A right to choice is a moral issue, and should be out the hands of the government. Whatever government should have a hands on, it should be about rights. The government does not do abortions, but they do capital punishment. Big difference.
8. You have to believe that businesses create oppression, and governments create prosperity.

Most of the wealth is handle by very few, and they aren't exactly rich because they like to give money away. We are about trying to get some equality, but at the same time keep the rich rich. It's hard as hell, you try.
9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists who've never been outside of Seattle do.

I hunt, and I'm Democrat. And lots of Democrats do care about nature, and a lot live in the mid-west and have farms.
10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

You can't do something usless you believe you can. If I think I'm a failure, I'll fail. Simple easy.
11. You have to believe the NRA is bad, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

Not all sides are right and wrong. But where in the blue hell is a right to an assult rifle given in the constitution. I don't think George Washington owned one.
12. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

Hell yeah. What do ATM fees pay for, as for taxes, you can pay for health care with that, education, roads, post office, military, I can go on. ATM fees pay for rich people getting richer.
13. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinnem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee or Thomas Edison.

What in the blue hell. Not more important, but should be at least mentioned. Lets not forget Caser Chavez and Fredrick Douglas.
14. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides aren't.

Ok dog, the SAT test was originally made to keep Jews out of college. Don't believe me, look it up. The test was set to be culturally biased, so that "real" Americans can still get into college easier. And no one has racial quotas, that's a term Bush made up, that isn't even proven. That's a whole 'nother thread.
15. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried, is because the right people haven't been in charge.

Northern Europe it works pretty damn well, Canada too. The United States from 1932-1980 it didn't to shabby either.
16. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying in drag, transvestites and bestiality should be constitutionally protected and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

Ok dog, you are tripping.
17. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the Chinese is somehow in the best interest of! the United States.

Again, crooked politians. We can't help it if they exist. Same with your party.
18. And finally, you have to believe that this post is part of a vast right wing conspiracy.

Hey, I could do one on Repulicans, no conspiracy
I lifted this from somewhere, but thought it was pretty funny.

Not bad, but really off.

[Woodrow]

LOL AT YOU TOO!

[Woodrow]

http://www.sothebys.com/

[M Dogg™]

oh,,, one more thing. Why you never replied to my evidence, both conservative and liberal about Bush cutting overtime pay?

[infinite59]

How to be a Good Democrat:

1. You have to believe the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

2. You have to believe that the same teacher, who can't teach 4th graders how to read, is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law abiding Americans are more of a threat, than U.S. nuclear weapons technology, in the hands of Chinese communists.

4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by yuppies driving SUVs.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.

7. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.

8. You have to believe that businesses create oppression, and governments create prosperity.

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists who've never been outside of Seattle do.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

11. You have to believe the NRA is bad, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

12. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

13. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinnem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee or Thomas Edison.

14. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides aren't.

15. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried, is because the right people haven't been in charge.

16. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying in drag, transvestites and bestiality should be constitutionally protected and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

17. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the Chinese is somehow in the best interest of! the United States.

18. And finally, you have to believe that this post is part of a vast right wing conspiracy.

I lifted this from somewhere, but thought it was pretty funny.

I got to admit.. that was pretty good.. I have nothing bad to say about this post.  I don't like Democrats or Republicans.  (Except for Dennis Kucinich)

[7even]

republicans gobble dick