Facts about Henrik Lundqvist:

[eKardz]

Facts about Henrik Lundqvist:

*Henke is so awesome at stopping projectiles that if you put him between two battallions firing at eachother in a war, there would be zero casualties.

*Rangers games have been banned by the bookies when Henke is in goal. He took away all the fun in gambling.

*Henke is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will smother an impossible shot in his glove.

*Time waits for no man, unless that man is named Henrik Lundqvist.

*Henke is the only goalie to get more than 100% saving percentage.

*Henke sheds his skin twice a year.

*When Henke makes a save, Henke doesn't save the puck. The puck goes to Henke.

*If you look upp the word "victim" in an english dictionary, it defines it as "someone who tries to score on Henrik Lundqvist."

*If you Google search "Henrik Lundqvist performed badly" you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.

*It takes Henke 20 minutes to watch 60 minutes.

*Henke amuses himself by dressing flies in a tiny funeral tuxedo before smacking them, because he thinks they have such slow reaction.

*If a hockey player even dreams of scoring a goal on Henke, he will still be there to make the save.

*Henke can touch MC Hammer.

*Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Henrik Lundqvist pajamas.

*Henke can create coal into a diamond if holding the coal in his glove. Then he can create the diamond back into coal again.

*When Henke makes a move, he doesn't exactly move. It's the world that moves around him.

*Scotty in Star Trek often says “Ye cannae change the laws of physics.” This is untrue. Henrik Lundqvist can change the laws of physics.

*If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Henke would ever compete against himself in each goal, he'd win. Period.

*The creators of the movie Matrix got their ideas for stunts while watching Henrik Lundqvist stand in goal. They had to tone it down though, Henkes' moves were more advanced than the computer technology at that time could replicate.

*Henke is never sick. Viruses and bacterias are too afraid to enter his body.

*The opening scene for "Saving Private Ryan" used a puck machine that Henke uses for soft practice.

*Henke recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

*Ice hockey don't have intermissions for each 20 min of play to wet the ice again, it's because they need to cool it down from Henke being too hot.

*If at first you don't succeed, you're not Henrik Lundqvist.

*The rocket was originally created because Henrik Lundqvist needed a challenge. The scientists gave up trying to beat him and decided to aim the rocket upwards and fly into space instead.

*Earth scientists had for long wondered how to save the earth from dangerous meteors. That was until Henrik Lundqvist was born.

*There is still a mystery if Henke actually has a black hole planted in his glove.

*Henke sometimes blindfolds himself before going out to the game to make it more challenging.

*Contrary to popular belief, the Titanic didn't hit an iceberg. It hit Henrik Lundqvist out for practice.

*Originally, icehockey was invented by penguins, playing it very skillfully on the North Pole. Then Henrik Lundqvist appeared and the penguins got so frustrated that they had to move to the other side of earth. They have never played hockey again.

*When Israel was bombarded by SCUDs in the Gulf War, Israel was defended by Patriot missiles. As of today, everyone agrees Henrik Lundqvist should have been sent instead.

*Maslow's theory of higher needs does not apply to Henrik Lundqvist. He only has two needs: saving pucks and finding pucks to save.

*Henrik Lundqvist once tried playing baseball as a pitcher. But he was banned from the game, because every time his glove smothered the ball before it came even close to the batter.

*The inventors of the condom wanted to name their creation "Henrik Lundqvist". This wasn't possible though, because the condom isn't 100% effective.

*There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Henrik Lundqvist.

*A hockey player once dreamt that he scored a goal on Henrik Lundqvist. Then he was awakened as he got sucked into a wormhole. Even dreaming of scoring a goal on Henke causes a huge glitch in physical laws, logic and possibility.

*The particle accelerator, located in Switzerland and France, was created to try giving Henrik Lundqvist a challenge.

*The minigun was also created to give Henrik Lundqvist a challenge.

*Once Henrik Lundqvist was on vacation and went to the Niagara Falls. He saved every drop for 3 hours and then got bored.

*In off-seasons, Henke sometimes practices by catching landing aircrafts on military carriers.

*Phantom moves faster than lightning flash. Then Henrik Lundqvist robbed Phantom of the puck.

*Lucky Luke shoots faster than his shadow, but then Henke ruined everything and caught the bullet.

[ωεεźγ ғ]

*Henke aint got shit on Vancouver's Forwards.

[herpes]

^^^wishes lundqvist was his goalie^^^

[ωεεźγ ғ]

^wishes the mets for once could compete with the yankees

[eKardz]

^wishes the mets for once could compete with the yankees

david wright baby.

best young player

[herpes]

^wishes the mets for once could compete with the yankees

hahaha someone is hurt lundqvist isnt there goalie.  Where talking hockey here, what does baseball have to do with hockey.

[herpes]

or are you still made about 1994, it happened almost 12 years ago get over it.

[ωεεźγ ғ]

how is me saying lundqvist does not have shit on Vancouver's forwards have to do anything with me wishing he was my goalie?

or maybe i should expect this from a new york mets fan...after all you guys do boo your own team lol lame

[herpes]

how is me saying lundqvist does not have shit on Vancouver's forwards have to do anything with me wishing he was my goalie?

or maybe i should expect this from a new york mets fan...after all you guys do boo your own team lol lame

ok lets stay on the same sport here, where talking about hockey, not baseball.  if you want to discuss the mets go make a thread about it.  But just for the record all ny fans boo their teams when they dont perform the way they should *remembers when skankee fans boo'ed donny baseball in 95 relentlessy* sorry i guess where just passionate people.

[eS El Duque]

^wishes the mets for once could compete with the yankees

hahaha someone is hurt lundqvist isnt there goalie.  Where talking hockey here, what does baseball have to do with hockey.

Canucks OWN Lundqvist <-----FACT!

Tue. 13    at NY Rangers    W 3-2 ...Lundqvist lost...so until lundqvist stops us...

[herpes]

^wishes the mets for once could compete with the yankees

hahaha someone is hurt lundqvist isnt there goalie.  Where talking hockey here, what does baseball have to do with hockey.

Canucks OWN Lundqvist <-----FACT!

Tue. 13    at NY Rangers    W 3-2 ...Lundqvist lost...so until lundqvist stops us...

i wouldnt call losing  3-2 owing someone.  Now it he lost twice to them by like a 7-2 score or he had to get pulled that would be owning.

[eS El Duque]

^wishes the mets for once could compete with the yankees

hahaha someone is hurt lundqvist isnt there goalie.  Where talking hockey here, what does baseball have to do with hockey.

Canucks OWN Lundqvist <-----FACT!

Tue. 13    at NY Rangers    W 3-2 ...Lundqvist lost...so until lundqvist stops us...

i wouldnt call losing  3-2 owing someone.  Now it he lost twice to them by like a 7-2 score or he had to get pulled that would be owning.

Owning, defeating, beating...all the same shit 

congrats sweden

[Westcoastin']

*Henke aint got shit on Vancouver's Forwards.

Yeaaaaaa, im stoked they beat calgary the other day....i figured our D was so wiped out that Auld wouldnt stand a chance, good on them.

and those were all chuck norris facts, even if he can stop a puck, he aint stoppin a roundhouse kick to the face