It's August 28, 2025, 04:09:07 PM
Number of times Tim Duncan makes the god-awful "Who me?" bug-eyed face: 498Number of times Ginobli flops like a soccer sissy to draw a foul: 35Number of times we're forced to hear about "what a great guy Derek Fisher is": 73Number of steroid injections Boozer gets during the series: 3Number of zits Boozer develops on his face during the series: 28Number of fouls Bowen commits that don't get called: 4,527Number of actual fouls we hope it'll take for Boozer to bodyslam Bowen: 1Number of minorities spotted at any Jazz home game: 5Number of times Eva Longoria changes wedding plans during series: 8Number of times AK-47 cries: 1Number of big shots Rob Horry makes: 0Number of big cheap shots Rob Horry makes: 2Number of fans Spurs will gain from the series: -8,752 [yes, that's a negative sign]Number of exciting games we'll have: 0Number of games that'll pass SpongeBob Squarepants in the ratings: NONEEnjoy the series (all 7 of you). My toilet calls.