Poem - 'Mind Over Heart, Or Heart Over Mind' (Feedback plz)

[Reef]

This, a poem for my girl totally true stories and comments inside it. Its like the deepest ever i got in my thoughts/rhymes/poems about her.. All this is what i feel

Heart

i just think its gotta be said, how much i really do love you
how much i bleed, throb when your gone
or when you say you wont be there, its like a sad song
then the sky closes in and it gets dark
oh so dark, without you i'd be a broken heart
but the pain is so intense, with what you say
the agony is intense, when you hurt me
maybe you dont know it, but so many times its happened
but i try not to show it
sometimes, my emotion pours out
then it seems like im in the wrong for that time i decided to shout
or the time that i decided to ignore you,
or when i cried coz you made me feel bad, but baby i adore you
theres no way i can let go of you, no matter how much pain
i live life in vien, beacuse your the one that keeps me sane
but sometimes you put the 'in' infront of the word

Mind

its over, thats what i keep rehearsing
thinkin it could all be over, if i jsut stopped cursing
and got it over with, get it out in the open
but theres this thing down below
just 'beats' me to the word
and they come out, as the truth,
i love you, i know this love, a year old, its in its youth
and it feels like im not appriciated
seems like you dont want to make the effort
dont want to say how you really feel
so you write it, and i do belive
but love is more than words
beacuse words can decieve,
and what you write you might not mean
im trying to keep my mind fresh, thoughts clean
then you say, before i wasn't attractive
the 'stud' look, apparantly i lacked it
but now im sexy, so dont worry about that
feels like we're the good and the bad
and i know opposites attract

Heart

how many times can i weap
how many times, will you deprive me of sleep?
cause i cry so much, for what you have done
we could be done with, but i love you so
i know i repeat it, but the truth hurts
and in this case the joy converts
and i feel real agony

[:-:Mistah Menace:-:]

Yo Man, Thats Deep, Keep Dropping...


These Lines Standed Out More In The First Heart Part...

"then the sky closes in and it gets dark
oh so dark, without you i'd be a broken heart"

"theres no way i can let go of you, no matter how much pain
i live life in vien, beacuse your the one that keeps me sane"


These Lines Standed Out More In The Mind Part...


"seems like you dont want to make the effort
dont want to say how you really feel
so you write it, and i do belive
but love is more than words
beacuse words can decieve"


These Lines Standed Out More In The Second Heart Part...


"how many times can i weap
how many times, will you deprive me of sleep?
cause i cry so much, for what you have done
we could be done with, but i love you so"

Peace Out, 1ne..

[Gay-o Felony]

Homie, i felt that 1 the most out of all of em... deep.. i could relate to some of im sometimes... If ya wanna get shit off ya chest, holla at me on aim or msn!


1

[Kill]

really deep, you seemed to have captured your emotions greatly...good poem

[Rippa]

its over, thats what i keep rehearsing
thinkin it could all be over, if i jsut stopped cursing
and got it over with, get it out in the open
but theres this thing down below
just 'beats' me to the word
and they come out, as the truth,
i love you, i know this love, a year old, its in its youth
and it feels like im not appriciated
seems like you dont want to make the effort
dont want to say how you really feel
so you write it, and i do belive
but love is more than words
beacuse words can decieve,
and what you write you might not mean
im trying to keep my mind fresh, thoughts clean
then you say, before i wasn't attractive
the 'stud' look, apparantly i lacked it
but now im sexy, so dont worry about that
feels like we're the good and the bad
and i know opposites attract

^^^ Caught my EYE

i lyked the whole concept the whole poem it was Deep.. dis is type of poems i could read n actually feel da whole thang.. nice pieace cuz very nice.. keep writein poems n spittin lyrics..
 
eva wanna collab hit me up on pmz n well discuss suttin..1

[bez]

dam man that was cool.