West Coast Connection Forum
DUBCC - Tha Connection => West Coast Classics => Topic started by: TraceOneInfinite on August 17, 2007, 09:37:43 AM
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LOL.. just another day at Aftermah...
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Random Label A&R sits all alone in Aftermath offices....
---Knock Knock Knock!!!---
---silence-------
---Knock Knock Knock!!!----
Raekwon: "Yo, anybody there?"
Label A&R: "Who is it?"
Raekwon: "It's the Chef, nigga, open up?"
Label A&R: "Who the fuck is the Chef. You know we are closed at 2pm on Wednesdays."
Raekwon: "The Chef, nigga, you know, Wu-Tang Clan ain't nuthin to fuck with!"
Label A&R: "Ohh, sorry, yeah, come on in. How's the album comin."
Raekwon: "Yo, it's hott. Niggaz been puttin in mad work on this shit, god. Now we just ready for Dre to do his magic and make this shit a classic."
Label A&R: "Ummm... yeah... you know... about Dre. He's busy working on Detox I think. I don't think he's gonna be available for a little while."
Rakwon: "Well, you better call dude, cause I done signed with this label for less than a point just so I could work with Dre and make a classic."
Label A&R: "You know, I hear Koch records is given pretty good contracts these days to has-beens----- I mean, experienced artists who are looking to release another quality album."
Raekwon: "Naw nigga! Now you get on the phone and call Dre, I'm ready to be the next DOC, the next Snoop, the next Eminem, the next 50 Cent, it's my time to shine solo nigga! Now get on the phone before I tie your asshole up and start feeding you!"
Label A&R: "Okay, okay, but.. Dre changed his number. Let me call his friend, director Phill Atwell and see if I can get it."
...to be continued
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LOL... Wouldn't surprise me.
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...3 weeks later, label A&R returns Raekwon's dozens of messages he's been leaving at the office.....
Afermath Label A&R: "Hello Ray? Yes. This is Chuck the label A&R here at Aftermath. Yes. Your gonna be very happy"
Raekwon: -----You got ahold of Dre?-----
Label A&R: "Well, not exactly. But we got a release date scheduled for your album! Your due on October 3rd!"
Raekwon: "What the fuck? How you gonna give me a release date when my album ain't even been finished. And let me guess, Detox is due in November."
Label A&R: "Yes, Detox is due Nov. 31rst. Although that date is subject to change."
Raekwon: "I'm startin to wonder why I even signed at this damn label."
Label A&R: "If it would make you feel better. You can have free studio time at our offices. Many rappers have came through over the years, let's see, there was Sharief, Nationowl, Hands On, The Firm was here, King Tee put in some nice work, we even recorded his single there, ummm.. hit man recorded some stuff as well, we've had Rakim, Eve, Truth Hurts, many great artists have came, I think you'll be pleased with what we have to offer."
Raekwon hangs up.
...to be continued...
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LMAO... as soon as i get to a computer I am going to hit the prop button for your creativity...
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LMAO... as soon as i get to a computer I am going to hit the prop button for your creativity...
Thanks.. but it probably has more to do with getting my shifts canceled at work this week and having too much free time on my hands.
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thats ok... creativity strikes at its oddest moments... like when you are taking a shit, shower or a shave... or bored because of too much time on your hands.
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how do u prop?
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you get the option to prop or diss after amassing a certain amount of posts..
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Part 3:
...Label A&R puts "Closed for Business, returning in one hour" sign on the door to the Aftermath offices as he cruises to Wall-Mart to buy some more red tape....
...He returns to office to find several more messages on the answering machine, it was the usual characters, like Ice Cube and Dre's son....
Ice Cube: "Yo, this is Cube nigga, I got a new idea for that NWA reunion project. Okay, so the Snoop in place of Eazy E idea wasn't crackin.. I know, I know... but what about Eazy E's son, Lil Eazy? Holler back... and ohhh yeah, no hard feelings about not returning my calls about getin a track or two for WC's album, I know you were probably busy, no problem, please call back..."
Hood Surgeon: "Daddy, Daddy. My album is out. People are saying it's hot. I'm finally going to get my street credibility, we are bringing back the West Coast gangsta era. Just you watch daddy, I'm going to make you proud of me. The only problem is people are saying that the only reason people listen to me is cause I'm your son, but I'm going to show them daddy, we keepin it gangsta, just like you and Snoop did it!"
-------there were another 7 or so messages, Knocturnal had a strange message still complaining about the pressing of his 2002 EP, and DOC sayin he was finally gettin his voice to come back a little.. finally he just hit DELETE! "Same old, same old".
TO BE CONTINUED
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Haha.. that Hood Surgeon one was funny as fuck..
props for this one homie.. Part 3:
...Label A&R puts "Closed for Business, returning in one hour" sign on the door to the Aftermath offices as he cruises to Wall-Mart to buy some more red tape....
...He returns to office to find several more messages on the answering machine, it was the usual characters, like Ice Cube and Dre's son....
Ice Cube: "Yo, this is Cube nigga, I got a new idea for that NWA reunion project. Okay, so the Snoop in place of Eazy E idea wasn't crackin.. I know, I know... but what about Eazy E's son, Lil Eazy? Holler back... and ohhh yeah, no hard feelings about not returning my calls about getin a track or two for WC's album, I know you were probably busy, no problem, please call back..."
Hood Surgeon: "Daddy, Daddy. My album is out. People are saying it's hot. I'm finally going to get my street credibility, we are bringing back the West Coast gangsta era. Just you watch daddy, I'm going to make you proud of me. The only problem is people are saying that the only reason people listen to me is cause I'm your son, but I'm going to show them daddy, we keepin it gangsta, just like you and Snoop did it!"
-------there were another 7 or so messages, Knocturnal was next wantin some money to get out on bail, and DOC sayin he was finally gettin his voice to come back a little.. finally he just hit DELETE! "Same old, same old".
TO BE CONTINUED
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there might be a message from JJ Fad asking to do Super Sonic Part 2... with that chick in the background going "soma-loma-linga-linga-soma-loma" ...
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Part 3:
...Label A&R puts "Closed for Business, returning in one hour" sign on the door to the Aftermath offices as he cruises to Wall-Mart to buy some more red tape....
...He returns to office to find several more messages on the answering machine, it was the usual characters, like Ice Cube and Dre's son....
Ice Cube: "Yo, this is Cube nigga, I got a new idea for that NWA reunion project. Okay, so the Snoop in place of Eazy E idea wasn't crackin.. I know, I know... but what about Eazy E's son, Lil Eazy? Holler back... and ohhh yeah, no hard feelings about not returning my calls about getin a track or two for WC's album, I know you were probably busy, no problem, please call back..."
Hood Surgeon: "Daddy, Daddy. My album is out. People are saying it's hot. I'm finally going to get my street credibility, we are bringing back the West Coast gangsta era. Just you watch daddy, I'm going to make you proud of me. The only problem is people are saying that the only reason people listen to me is cause I'm your son, but I'm going to show them daddy, we keepin it gangsta, just like you and Snoop did it!"
-------there were another 7 or so messages, Knocturnal was next wantin some money to get out on bail, and DOC sayin he was finally gettin his voice to come back a little.. finally he just hit DELETE! "Same old, same old".
TO BE CONTINUED
LMAO @ the cube & surgeon 1s
Knoc ain't in prison :P lol
styles: props, u a damn fool
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LMAO @ the cube & surgeon 1s
Knoc ain't in prison :P lol
styles: props, u a damn fool
I edited some stuff
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LMAO @ the cube & surgeon 1s
Knoc ain't in prison :P lol
styles: props, u a damn fool
I edited some stuff
lol true...well knoc has had his fair share with run-in's with the law so it's all good lol
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i sure hope he didn't think my post was serious...lol
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i sure hope he didn't think my post was serious...lol
lmao, he defanitely didn't
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Lmfao @ dat jj fad shyt.
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Haha, that shit is really great ;D
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I think that there was also a message from game crying that he just made up with 50 then dre turns on sirus sattelate radio and he hears skee talking about game just sended in a new diss track like 2 minutes ago and he's dissing the shit out 50
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Good stories and good reads man.... Yo you could have youe own section of these stories man .....
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I think that there was also a message from game crying that he just made up with 50 then dre turns on sirus sattelate radio and he hears skee talking about game just sended in a new diss track like 2 minutes ago and he's dissing the shit out 50
LOL... yeah... there definitely has to be some fanatical messages from Game
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I think that there was also a message from game crying that he just made up with 50 then dre turns on sirus sattelate radio and he hears skee talking about game just sended in a new diss track like 2 minutes ago and he's dissing the shit out 50
LOL... yeah... there definitely has to be some fanatical messages from Game
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA You a fool
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Just Another Day At Aftermath Part 4.. The Series Continues...
Installment 4
Aftermath Vice-President Makes An Office Call...no answer....answering machine message comes on....
"Welcome to Aftermath records. The home of hip-hop and R&B, with fresh new artists, Handz On, King Tee, RBX, Cristopher Glove, Kim, Ruben Cruz, and Christopher Glove. Aftermath also promises to revolutionize hip-hop with Dre's work with East Coast artist such as Nas and Foxxy Brown, and introducing a new form of music called Ghetto Metal. Aftermath, we don't set trip, we set trends! Please leave your message after the tone----BEEP!"
Aftermath Vice President: "Damnit, how come we still have the same damn answering machine message as we had in 1996? I thought we had that changed to something about some of our newer artists? I'm going to have somebody's asses fired. Call me back immediately. Nobody has seen or heard from Dre, and I need to hold a meeting with the employee's, because with digital media and all, record sales ain't what they used to be. Call me back immediately, don't make me leave my summer vacation early to come down there and do some work myself!"
2 weeks pass, Label A&R calls into Aftermath Vice President
Label A&R: "Hello. You wanted to speak with me. I got your message, you know, things have been kind of slow around here. But I've been making sure we stay stocked up on red tape. You wanted to speak to me."
Aftermath Vice President: "First of all, what the fuck happened to the answering machine message. Didn't the last one have something about Busta Rhymes, Rakim, Eve, and the Game?"
Label A&R: "Uhhhh yes, boss, but all those artists are gone now. So, it didn't make sense to use that message, it might be a conflict of interest. So we removed it and just went back to the default message, nobody ever calls here anyway... well, except for the Game when he's drunk... and Ice Cube still talking about "Helter Skelter" or DOC about his voice, but we don't really count them anymore, they've been washed up for years".
Aftermath Vice President: "Whatever. Listen. We are going to have to do some downsizing. I need a meeting with all the other employee's. You see, most of the business is taking place in Jimmy's office over at interscope anyway. They've been handling 50 Cent's new record and Paul Rosenberg over at Shady Records handles all of Eminem's affairs. So we are going to have to cutback on our budget by firing a few employee's."
Label A&R: "No... please boss. Really, I'm the only one down here. And I don't want to lose my job. What about the Detox record, I heard it's scheduled to be released soon, isn't there some promotional initiatives that need to be developed for the coming release of Detox?"
-----Aftermath Vice President laughs.... and laughs.... and laughs some more.......---------
Aftermath Vice President: "Uhhh, funny thing about that Detox record. Uhhh... Well, you know how it goes. Remember back in 1998 when Dre pretty much fired all of his artists and staff, and they kept saying a Chronic 2 record was about to come out?"
Label A&R: "Yes, I remember that."
Aftermath Vice President: "Well, it's kind of like that, but worse. See, basically I'm supposed to be the vice president, and I can't even get a hold of Dre. Hell, his own son, Hood Surgeon hasn't even seen him. And God knows, Dre would have never allowed him to put out that album if he had. Anyway, just be lucky we are still collecting royalty checks from the few albums we have actually released at the label. Listen, I'll tell you what, I'm going to stay out here on vacation, let's just keep our mouths shut, and try to ride this thing as far as we can."
Hangs up.
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As promised +1....
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How in the fuck did you amass -446 Karma? lol...
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How in the fuck did you amass -446 Karma? lol...
Some people at this forum are prejudice and have a problem with me being a Muslim.
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this was the Aftermath one I did