West Coast Connection Forum
Lifestyle => Tha G-Spot => Topic started by: Suga Foot on January 25, 2003, 12:02:01 AM
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I heard these on TV like 2 years ago and they've just stuck with me. The first one was by Winston Churchill (I think) but it goes like this:
WOMAN: If You Were My Husband, I'd Poison Your Coffee
CHURCHILL: If You Were MY Wife, I'd Drink It.
#2, and my personal favorite, from one of my favorite comedians, Dave Letterman. There was an asain woman that was a guest on his show. She was complaining how people in the western world never eat anything but hamburgers and fries etc.
WOMAN: You people need to open your eyes and see what's out there. You never have anything exciting, for example, have you ever had the Hump of a Camel?
LETTERMAN: I may have never had the hump of a camel, but when I was 17, I wasn't bad.
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hahaha, that is pretty funny.
I'll give you one yall might not appreciate, haha
Last month, Michael Jackson was on trial, and the guy was asking him about business decisions from years ago, and Mike was saying he didn't want to answer, because he couldn't completely remember, and didn't want to lie. So he was saying he didn't recall, just to be honest about all the questions the guy was asking him (he said he doesn't handle business decisions, so he never remembers numbers and things)
Anyways, the prosecutor was grilling him on the stand, asking him question after question about all these things like "Did you talk to mr. so and so about when practice would take place?" and he was like "I don't recall"
Every answer, he'd say "Um... I don't recall" "I don't recall".... "I don't recall"... "Sorry, I can't recall".
Finally, after like 2 hours of getting nowhere, the Prosecutor got this sick look on his face, and was like, "Mr. Jackson, do you suffer from some kind of memory problem or something?"
Mike thought for a second.... then leaned into the microphone and said "Not that I can recall" with a smile.
LOL
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I heard these on TV like 2 years ago and they've just stuck with me. The first one was by Winston Churchill (I think) but it goes like this:
WOMAN: If You Were My Husband, I'd Poison Your Coffee
CHURCHILL: If You Were MY Wife, I'd Drink It.
#2, and my personal favorite, from one of my favorite comedians, Dave Letterman. There was an asain woman that was a guest on his show. She was complaining how people in the western world never eat anything but hamburgers and fries etc.
WOMAN: You people need to open your eyes and see what's out there. You never have anything exciting, for example, have you ever had the Hump of a Camel?
LETTERMAN: I may have never had the hump of a camel, but when I was 17, I wasn't bad.
lol
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Speaking of funny interogations, any of yalll check the episode of OZ when the FBI is questioning Pancamo for the death of Schillengers son?
FBI- Have u heard of a man named Vern Schillenger?
Pancamo- Not that i recall
FBI- He goes to OZ, he works in the kitchen with you!
Pancamo- Not that i recall
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I've got another Churchill quote
Woman - "Winston you're drunk, horribly, horribly drunk"
Churchill - "Well you are ugly, horribly, horribly ugly, but in the morning I shall be sober"
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I thought this thread was gunna be about webster or someone :-\
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funny shit ;D
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churchill, what a guy