West Coast Connection Forum
Elements => Tha Studio => Topic started by: Proph aka ..::Konztrukt::.. on May 28, 2003, 04:31:56 PM
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15 bars max
first to 4 votes
3-0 votes=ko
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i know yall new but u should both say u've checked in an pick who goes first an i deadline if yall want one
peaze
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ayo listen up to this closely son im the motherfucka who owns this section/
tha don of em all they rise and they fall but i be the one who beats u to a crawl/
lookin for love in alll the wrong places/homie u dont know me but i will love to beat yo face in/
like a dog in a cage ill make u feel my rage ill rip ur fuckin heart out then its war i will wage/
my life is fucked up beyond any help/so just pack up yo rhymes and put dem back on da shelf/
to bring it all to a point/like jesus they will annoint/
me as the king of this battle while u just a baby wit a rattle/
this is straight up psychology ill make u see the light like the doctors of optomotry/
when u workin late at night i be at ur house fuckin the shit out yo wife/
im so fuckin hard that when u disregard i stab u in the neck with a fuckin glass shard/
its like u the victim and i the assailant i see u walkin up i knock yo ass off the railin/
and send yo ass sailin then i put one in ur brain n'/
u cant do ur show u got a tag on ur toe/
chillin like a villain im ready able and willin/
to smack u up and beat u to a pulp cuz i bring it to ur ass the the US in the gulf/
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good shit yo
where's jaydubuwa, u up next dawg
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Listen, u call urself the one n only wit ur over tha rim pride but u ain’t shit homie/
U ain’t nuthin: probably a bita, just a fake ass phonie/
Dum wanksta sittin there smokin ur cheap ass stogiez/
Spittin mad disses but u don’t fuckin know me/
U anotha dummy like lost talkin about animalz in cage tryin to describe ur rage/(1)
Got my anger risin faster, almost ready ta bust out a 12 gauge/
Naw just playin I fight fist ta fist not like a puss wit a glass shard/(2)
Yo i’m unpredictable catchin everyone off guard/
Ur shit has no rhyme gottin ya lookin like a retard/
Afta I’m done with u everyone will be sendin ya a get well soon card/
Rhymin how ya think u own this section, tryin ta act like yo shitz perfection/(3)
Ur only a lil geezy like me ya gotta earn respect/
Just like some of tha newbiez we’re insignificant just like an insect/
Tryin ta be portayed as a big shot, too much pride eatin u alive/
last line stingin ya shit like tha pain of a bee hive/
(1)Aww shit they done let lost out of his cage/
(Re:Lost Titan -vs- Jaydubwa
« Reply #1 on: May 06, 2003, 12:58:11 PM ») also 1nonly acting like a dog in a cage
(2)1nonlyz line about comin at me with a glass shard
(3)beginning when he sayz he ownz this section
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i'ma have to go with The1NOnly on this...
explanation: his shit was hard hitting from beginning to end, some real cut throat shit, i like the raw aggression there, these lines were hella tight
tha don of em all they rise and they fall but i be the one who beats u to a crawl/
lookin for love in alll the wrong places/
homie u dont know me but i will love to beat yo face in/
like a dog in a cage ill make u feel my rage ill rip ur fuckin heart out then its war i will wage/
u cant do ur show u got a tag on ur toe/
chillin like a villain im ready able and willin/
to smack u up and beat u to a pulp cuz i bring it to ur ass the the US in the gulf/
- thought that shit was pretty rugged, hehe geyeah that's how battles should be
jay's had good flow but honestly needed to be more hard hittin'
good battle though: 2 newbies with different styles hitting it off
vote = The1NOnly
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thanx 4 tha input
1-0: The1NOnlyEvidence
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word white-chocolate..thanks fo the props dogg
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name change....i didnt feel right saying i was the 1 and only evidence....we alll know Ev from Dilated rules his shit....so u see my new name....it will be changed permantently soon.
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Vote= Jaydubuwa
his shit flowed better, I thought, one and only had some decent punches but one line didn't flow to the next at all sometimes, and the lines were awkward. Y'all both would improve a lot if you started incorporatin' some multis in your rhymes, rather than just having one word rhyme. Jaydubuwa in your first line you could make a mulit outta that shit like "pain hits phonies, you ain't one and only, lame don't know me, u ain't shit homie" ect. Check sinsiter, mack, or daygo's rhymes for tight multis. Peace.
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thanx 4 tha vote vito. more votes plz.
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YO WE NEED MORE VOTE...LETS DO THIS YA HEARD
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jaydubya or whatever it is
his flowed better, simple as that
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yo jay flows a lot better, she tore it up (yeah she a girl)
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aight aight...s'all good....well homies i guess i gotta place more commas to let yall know how it sounds in my head....much to learn thats fo sho...thanks for tha input
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jaydubuwa
sounded alot better, abit simplistic but kept the rhyme and flow
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yo i guess jay took this one....but i say we keep it goin cuz right now i feel like spittin...so if u wanna keep this battle goin then battle back....if not just drop some feed backon how i do...aight peace 1
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after that BATTLE u can throw away yo RATTLE/
but i herd the peeps like a rancher wit his CATTLE//
my flow needs WORK, but ima go BERZERK/
my bright white SHIRT reads van city not iraq or TURK//
stayin true to tha GAME, its a sad sad SHAME/
that u think im just LAME, but taht ignites my FLAME//
rippin MCs like anal TEARS, u just cant TOUCH-ME/
all i SEE is nasty GLARES, u just fat and UG-LY//
i think i SHOULD, break out my 5 WOOD/
smash u real GOOD, leave u dead where u STOOD//
im as CRAY-ZEE, as killer clown john GA-CY/
just like a bitch u MACE-ME, but it just dont PHASE-ME, ok//
i aint about-to-PLAY, u come around-my-WAY/
i mold the fuckin youth just like an artist-use-CLAY/
u have no SAY, an i MAY, just cause a FRAY, or even a MALAE, but thats fine with MAY(me)//
i know im just-a-ROOKIE, but im here for GOOD/
bitches come at me wit-dey-NOOKIE, just like they fuckin SHOULD//
but yo im just about-to-be-DONE, this wasnt a great ONE, but it was good enough to say WHERE THE FUCK HE CAME FROM?
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lits more tehn 15 bars....but whatever just spit ur shit as long as u want.
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Dude, just a piece of advice, you don't have to capitalize the words that rhyme, peeps will be able to figure it out. ;) Another thing people look for as far as rhymes on this board go is a little more complex of a rhyme scheme, incorporating multis and rhyming more than on word at a time, ie if you took your first line "after that battle you can throw away your rattle" and made it somethin like "aint hard-to-tell by your prattle that you got rattled in battle," or somethin, ya know? That's just off the dome, but I hope you get the picture. Just tryin' to help.
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yo vito thanks for the advice amn thats what i was lookin for....i just thought id try explaining myself better in hte last one but i went a little overboard i guess..haha..oh well im just learning man just tryin to feel how its done around here...anyways thanks again homie...peace 1
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so let me see if i got u right...
as an MC u have no skillz, u just poppin pills and sendin bills while i be out lookin fo thrills, and it kills, me as a playa in this game, i have no shame its all lame, u just cant be who u claim...stating u a gangsta, ur store bought u will get shot if u get caught u just a wanksta, pranksta, little boy spanksta, best move out the way or get got by my tanksta, or a shanksta in ur fuckin flanksta...shit, if u knew how raw i was, u would be shocked how its on lock and u get rocked if u step cuz.......tell me how that is homies
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DAAAAMMMMMNN HOMIE! Seriously dude, you just improved like 1000% , that was cool man. Now just incorporate some multis and some metaphors and you'll be a stone cold killa! Peace man.
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ya G, once you got that down then just tidy shit up a bit cuz ur lines are so long, just space it out and shit, make it loook PIMP y'know lol
peaze
*nice shit by the way, i agree on the improve bro
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Actin like farmer joe, fuckin ur scraggled tooth hoe wit her nasty camel toe/
This shitz realistic ,ur view's too optimistic got me goin ballistic tryin to make u realize u got wack logistic/
Ya need ta learn ta describe yo shit , no onez feelin ur vibe not even a lil bit, me beatin ya once has u in a hissy fit, like a little bitch still suckin his mamaz tit/
Just cuz I'm a female doesnt mean I'm destined to fail -got u goin crazy like a dog chasin his own tail/
I'm not a ditzy chick thinking Im too ritzy to truthfully say ur a limp dick odeed on viagara havin all tha gurlz u pursue say sayonara/
Shit in a conflict I wouldnt use mace but I would make sure my fist would shatta ur mad hatta face and be so fast that tha cops wouldn't match my pace/
Hopefully this is tha last battle we share cuz anymore of ur thoughtless rugged style I couldnt bear-thinking ur off tha wall technique would make this battle yours but ya don't get tha drift that theez words come quickly like sweat out my pores that catalyze u to cry like a bitch ass on all fourz/
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replied- had shit ta do-sorry took so long
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Hey jaydubuwa, good verse, better than 1n only's. I dunno if you guys are battlin' again or what, but I think a lot of people won't think to look here, maybe you should move the verses to a new thread? You female huh? You fine? Just wonderin...
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aight i have to say...jay ur shit was tight i liked it a lot...even tho we battlin i gotta give u props...and thanks for the input guys...the more the better cuz obviously i got better after i took it....so yeah we should move this thread...ill give it a go cuz i dont knwo how to do it but ill figure it out...ill reply to that verse in a bit jay
peace 1
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Ayo, used to be the1nonly, didnt realize till God showed me, that im hot so He got a new name fo me/
ThaProphecy, not as it seems, ur whack rap tactic turns back and smacks u in the fuckin bean/
Farmer i think not, and if u do get shot it will not stop till i hear ur fuckin head pop/
shit, im hard like a diamond, like the ones in my ears bitch how could u not find them, im rhymin like i won the rap heisman, im blindin cuz so bright i be shinin/
U lack a lyrical attack, as a matter of fact i think that after that fat sack i just might react like shaq eating a big mac/
U know how it goes, my flows stop ur shows like popos bustin hoes/
Finally i must state, that viagra i might just take, and stab ur ditzy ass with my dick in yo face, the cops will see yo pace, smack u around realease the hounds as the sirens sound i wil be given 7 days grace
i dont know how that is....i dotn know im just no feelin it right now
peace 1