session 4 how to beat anxiety and depresssion

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MEGGAN How to stop destroying yourself from the inside out‏
From: Lucinda Bassett (attackinganxiety@attackinganxiety.com)
Sent: Sun 2/03/08 3:15 AM
Reply-to: attackinganxiety@attackinganxiety.com
To:  mm1970@hotmail.com

 
 21-Day Mini-Program: Session 4
Self Sabotage: Are You Destroying Yourself from the Inside Out?
 
 
 
   
 
Hello MEGGAN,
it's Lucinda!
Welcome to session 4 of my free 7-session course.

We packed a lot into our last session. I hope you've been practicing the 2-steps for ending a panic attack. Like any other learned skill, all it takes is a little effort and repetition to commit these steps to habit. It will be well worth the effort.

Today we're going to take a look at self-dialogue or self-talk.
 
It's the most underrated life skill on the planet. Positive self-talk. It's such a foreign concept to most people, especially people with the anxious personality type like ours.

I can't tell you how many letters I have received from people over the years saying, "I worked with a therapist for over six-months, we never even talked about negative and positive dialogue. I can't believe what a difference this has made in my life!"

Yes, positive self-talk to the key to healthy self-esteem. You need to become your own cheerleader. You need to learn to treat yourself with the respect you deserve. You need to become your OWN best friend, who is better qualified than you to fulfill your own needs, to love you unconditionally, forever?

You need to be able to make yourself feel safe, comforted, and in control.

So, here is Session Four of my free 21-day mini-program titled:

How to Overcome Anxiety and Depression and Start Living Life with Confidence, Joy and Peace of Mind.

Okay, let's begin...
 

   
 
Here's What You Can Expect in My FREE Course:
 
Session 1: Lucinda's Story: You're Not Losing Your Mind.
Session 2: Where Does Your Anxiety and Depression Come From? 
Session 3: How to Stop a Dreaded Attack Before it Starts.
Session 4: Self Sabotage: Are You Destroying Yourself from the Inside Out?
Session 5: How to Starve Your Anxiety & Depression of the Fuel it Needs to Thrive
Session 6: How to Take Control of Anger, Guilt, and other Toxic, Negative Emotions
Session 7: From Victim to Victor - Never Let Stress Rule Your Life Again 
MEGGAN, remember to save this in your email folder named: 'Lucinda Bassett's Mini Life Makeover.' Also, print this information right now so you can read it when you are offline.
 
   

 



Session Four: Self Sabotage: Are You Destroying Yourself from the Inside Out?
Sure-fire techniques to turn your life around through the power of self-talk.

Imagine walking into your closet and looking around at all of your old, worn-out stuff. The sweaters are all stretched out; the business suits are out of style. All of your nice shirts have a circa 1980 look to them; funky patterns and plain colors, big shoulder pads. Your shoes are scuffed up and worn out. Everything seems kind of dingy.

"Yuck," you think to yourself, "same old clothes, same old me."

Now imagine grabbing a few of those great big black garbage bags and stuffing them full of everything in your closet. All of it. Empty the entire closet into those bags and drive it to the nearest Good Will drop off.

Now go to the paint store, pick out your favorite color and paint the closet. Maybe a soft yellow or white or peach – whatever feels clean and new. Put up some soft track lighting or a beautiful new lamp that gives off a warm glow and change the carpeting so that it caresses your bare feet. Good beginning, clean foundation. Now for the fun stuff... let's go shopping!

Go out to you favorite department store or nearby mall. Let's start in the sportswear department. Pick out some workout cloths in fresh, light cotton. How about a few different colors too? Red, blue, crisp white. They feel soft and fresh, kind of playful.

Now off to the shoe department. Buy yourself a pair of brand new white tennis shoes; a comfortable pair that make you feel light and bouncy. You slide them on your feet and they make you feel energized, like you could run a marathon.

Onward to the suit department. It's time for a couple of fabulous power suits that will remind you of who you really are. Rich, powerful colors. Navy and black with the perfect accessories. You try them on and they make you feel strong, trim, energetic, and ready to take on the world.

Time to head back home and put all your new goodies in your freshly painted closet. Now look around. You think to yourself, "Wow, look at all of this. Look at all the potential I see. I'm going to feel more energetic, more powerful and professional, and much sexier. This is the new ‘me.' I can't wait to try it all out!"

How did you feel when you got rid of all your old worn-out, outdated stuff? Felt pretty good, didn't it?

Compassionate self-talk will make you feel similarly; more empowered, confident, relaxed, and sexier. You can accomplish major changes with compassionate self-talk and thought replacement.

Compassionate self-talk is any kind of message or dialogue with yourself or someone else that makes you feel good, strong, happy, confident, relaxed, capable, loving, energetic, peaceful, or motivated. The technique can give you energy when you think you have none, a natural high, and the strength to achieve great things. Positive self-talk can make you feel like running that mile, taking that trip, writing that report, or speaking in front of several hundred people when only ten minutes before you were certain you absolutely couldn't pull it off.
 


The desire and ability to do great things starts with the thought that you CAN.
 


Compassionate self-talk is the key to recovery, but you can't use the key until you learn how. It's like any other skill, it must be learned. You have to understand what the skill is, learn the technique, and then practice, practice, practice. Soon it will become second nature to you.

When you learn compassionate self-talk, the rewards will be beyond anything you can imagine, it will literally change your life. It will allow you to control your attitude and you'll find a new sense of confidence that will be yours to keep forever. We'll go into specific in a moment.
 


What is negative self-talk?
 


Negative thinking makes you feel bad, sad, angry, helpless, ugly, guilty, overwhelmed, depressed, insecure, and fearful. It leaves you discouraged and tired. Your negative thoughts are a direct cause for lack of inspiration, chronic lethargy, depression, and a feeling of being too drained to even go on trying.

If you feel that way sometimes, more than you should, or too much of the time, there is a good chance it's coming from your negative thinking.

But the fact is many people don't know how to recognize their own negative thoughts. Let's do a little experiment. Go out and buy yourself a pocket-sized spiral notebook. For the next week carry it around in your pocket or purse and track your negative thoughts by writing them down in your notebook. Remember to carry it with you at all times.

You will be amazed when you see how many negative thoughts you have in any given day, never mind a whole week. Thoughts like, "I'm tired, I don't want to go to work today, it's ugly outside, my head hurts, I feel fat."

So, how do we become a compassionate self-talker? We must learn a technique I call, "Empowering Thought Replacement." This requires writing down your negative thoughts as you have them then replacing (rewriting) these automatic, knee-jerk thoughts with more compassionate language.

The best possible time to replace a negative thought is the moment you have it. Upon writing it down, immediately write down the replacement thought beside it, even if it doesn't sound right, even if it sounds too contrived or too corny or too opposite to how you really feel. It may sound strange, but even if you don't believe the replacement thought, write it down.
 


Here's an example:

"I don't feel good today and I don't want to go to work."

Try replacing it with:

"I feel okay. I'm just tired and I'll get more energy as the day progresses. Once I get started, I'm sure I'll feel better."

I'm willing to bet that you are probably not so good at being compassionate with yourself. However, you are accustomed to giving encouragement to the people you love. And that's what you want to do with thought replacement; write your replacement thoughts as is they're coming from someone you love and care about.

If your child comes home from school crying, saying everyone in his class hates him or her, would you say, "Well, I don't blame them, maybe you should try and be nicer..." NO! You would put your arm around him or her and comfort them.
 


That's how you must begin treating yourself! You have to be your own best friend.
 


You have to be the one to make yourself feel better.

It will seem difficult at first, but don't get discouraged, be patient (resilience... session 1). Just keep practicing, everything improves with practice. When your commitment to replace your thoughts is solid believe me, you're well on your way to recovery. That's how important this practice is.

You must begin gently, with believable statements. If you wake up, look in the mirror and think to yourself, "I feel fat and ugly today," it would be foolish to replace that thought with, "No, I don't. I'm thin and I look just like Pamela Anderson."

You'll never believe it! Be realistic.

How about saying, "I'm going to wear something fun and comfortable today to make me feel good."

If you're on your way to work and you tell yourself, "I'm feeling anxious that this is going to be a bad day..." don't replace it with, "I'm not anxious, I feel great!" You'll never believe it because it's not true. Instead, try saying, "It's okay to feel a little anxious. It won't hurt me. I'll just relax and it'll pass." This will make you feel better.

Here are three examples of positive replacement statements taken from our list of 15-powerful (work now) statements from the Attacking Anxiety & Depression program. This is must the beginning of the powerful skill of positive thought replacement; a skill that can change your life forever.

Try replacing these after a few of your negative thoughts and see how it feels. When you get accustomed to the practice you can add your own to the list.
 
• It's no big deal.
• It's just anxiety. I'm going to float with it and it will go away.
• So what if...
• I'm anxious
• I'm late
• I can't think clearly
• There's turbulence
 
 
Now here are 3 examples of negative thoughts. Beneath them are suggestions on how you could incorporate some of the positive thoughts listed above into your empowering thought replacement dialogue.

Negative:"When will I ever get over these panic attacks? I feel so insecure and afraid sometimes."

Postive: "I'm working on getting over panic attacks. They won't hurt me. I'll just float with these feelings and they'll go away."
 
 
Negative: "I feel as if my anxiety is controlling my life. I hate these feelings."

Positive: "It's just anxiety. It's no big deal. Anxiety is a part of life. I'm doing better and learning to control it. It takes time and patience but I will conquer it."

Negative: "What if I have to leave my groceries and run out of the store? I'd be so embarrassed!"

Positive: "So what if I left my groceries and ran out of the store? No one would care. Like it would be the first time someone has ever done that? I could just say I wasn't feeling well. No big deal. It won't happen anyway."
 
 

   
About the Author:
Lucinda Bassett
Founder, CEO of the Midwest Center for
Stress & Anxiety.
For more than 1 million anxiety sufferers, Lucinda Bassett is a symbol of hope and strength. Severely affected by anxiety, panic, and depression in her 20s, she found the help she needed to overcome anxiety and depression. Determined to help others do the same, she founded the acclaimed Midwest Center for Stress and Anxiety.

Lucinda is also a nationally renowned motivational speaker and presenter. Her techniques have been shared with a variety of major corporations, professional associations and medical and educational institutions.

She has appeared on hundreds of local and national radio and television programs including Oprah, The View, Montel and Robert Schuller's Hour of Power. Plus, Lucinda and her work have been featured in a variety of high-profile publications, including Health, FamilyCircle®, Cosmopolitan and even the Journal of Clinical Psychology.

Most important, Lucinda is dedicated to helping those who are needlessly suffering from anxiety and depression. It is her life's work and her solemn commitment.
 
 
   

Session three of the Attacking Anxiety & Depression program on self-talk is the ‘hinge' session. There are MANY suggestions and examples of great positive dialoging. This skill is the key to freedom. This IS your ticket out.

When you've changed your thoughts from negative to positive, you'll begin to choose your friends much more carefully. You'll choose your love relationships more carefully. You'll choose what you say to yourself and others much more carefully too. What power it is to CHOOSE the messages that come into your head! What a treat to be able to say something complimentary to someone else and make their day!

Compassionate self-talk will completely transform your attitude. People love to be around positive, interesting people. Through positive self-talk, you'll begin attracting the right kind of people into your life. The people that can help you feel better. People who will help you reach your goals and dreams. It truly is magic.

There is nothing more worthy of your time than empowering thought replacement through compassionate self-talk. This skill will make you a better mother, a better wife, a better husband, a better athlete, teacher or employee.

Empowering thought replacement will make you an all around better person and will improve the quality of your life. Whether you want to become a professional speaker, write a book, take a trip overseas, get over anxiety disorder, or become President of the United States, practicing and perfecting this one skill will motivate and propel you to be compassionate and to have high self-esteem.

Instead of unknowingly sabotaging your efforts to navigate the challenges in your life, solutions will make themselves obvious.

Instead of thinking negatively, you will be goal-setting. Instead of worrying you will be dreaming.
 


This is how you transform the negative energy of panic into the positive energy of personal power!

Now we're really on to something wonderful!
 


Let's close today with 2 of my 6 Action Steps for Managing Negative Thoughts from the Attacking Anxiety & Depression program.
 


1. RECOGNIZE – if the thought is making you feel bad – Stop! In your minds eye picture a big, bright, red STOP sign as soon as you catch yourself thinking negatively.

2. PROBLEM SOLVE – what can you DO to improve the situation, get answers, or solve the problem your worrying about? Instead of just being fixated on the issue and mentally giving yourself a thrashing, what kind of plan of action can you create that might help change the situation, or at least help you put it into perspective and stop you from worrying about it?

Let's wrap this up. Get yourself a pocket-sized notebook, today. Begin writing down all of your negative thoughts as you have them. Begin to counter these thoughts by rewriting them in compassionate tones. See the 3-examples from earlier in this email for guidance.

Practice, practice, practice.

Aren't your dreams worth the effort? Aren't YOU worth the effort?

In our next session we're going to talk about how you can fuel your body so it purrs like a kitten, instead of roaring like an angry lion. There are specific substances you must avoid if you're feeling anxious and/or depressed. On the other hand, there are certain foods and nutrients that can actually help you feel more relaxed and calm.

Chances are your present diet is in serious need of tweaking.

Here's to the new you,





 
 
   
 
 


P.S. MEGGAN, if you're looking for a little more on today's session paste the following link into your browser for a quick video presentation : http://www.stresscenter.com/sessionprg/session4.htm

 

P.S.S If you don't want to wait a few days for my next email you can paste the following link into your browser and go through my step-be-step program revealing all of the secrets to finally taking control and enjoying life again. The complete story is told at: www.stresscenter.com/store


 
 

 
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