Author Topic: Insecurities  (Read 213 times)

morbidenigma

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Insecurities
« on: December 23, 2008, 02:20:00 AM »
Just something i was thinking about society says women have a lot of insecurities - women have added pressure of feeling they have to look a certain way, maybe read an article and start judging themselves, worry how they look to other men and women cause women judge other females aswell as men etc

But there's the other side we don't hear about the mans side

What issues do guys feel insecure about?

The only time i have witnessed guys actually being insecure is when they actually have GFs. For example, getting pissed of when they chat to other guys etc etc. Serious relationships or getting serious about a girl can make guys very insecure. I understand why they are that way, and why i would be that way if i was serious about someone too. The reason why? becos i know and maybe other guys know to from their time being single, that many women who are in relationships/married still act as if their single around other men, flirting, over fraternizing and on some occasions even cheating.

i dont what it is, i reckon it must be for their ego's that women need self assurance..they have to know still "have it"...they gotta feel as if they can still get any guy they want.

and shit gets much worse when the paranoia sets in too.  ;D




State your views and opinions
 

Matty

Re: Insecurities
« Reply #1 on: December 23, 2008, 06:35:00 AM »
i find a LOT of people i know/have known start to behave differently when getting serious with a girl. it's almost like they can't be themselves 100% so they present themselves differently to different people. now this might just be in public or whatnot but i think men in general have a lot of INSECURITIES ABOUT THEIR OWN CHARACTERS. they are too scared to show their softer side most of the time and have to over compensate by being too soft when around their women.

i believe in being straight up 100% and not having this character shift when around people of the opposite sex or whatever. you should be comfortable with yourself all the time, no major efforts to go one way or the other and conceal your feelings.

for example i have friends who can look me in the eye and tell me how much they love their girl etc and be completely straight about it and their emotions in general. other people have this macho complex and will refer to their girls physical qualities or whatever. i think you have to be comfortable with who you are deep down - that is generally guys biggest insecurity. another thing that links into that is BEING UNSURE about things. just because you don't have all the answers to life does not make you inferior in any way. guys can tend to have problems keeping an open mind. i would link this to insecurities about character and knowing who you are deep down again.

i think men feel pressured by society to know whats what for themselves and form formulate concrete world views from role models or whatever when in today's world its better to keep an open mind, ask questions of things, learn and grow continuously.

anyone agree with any of that?
« Last Edit: December 23, 2008, 06:38:29 AM by Matty »
 

ŕiņ

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Re: Insecurities
« Reply #2 on: December 23, 2008, 08:57:48 AM »
I agree, but reading this didn't make me any less insecure. Should i cut myself  ???
 

Matty

Re: Insecurities
« Reply #3 on: December 23, 2008, 09:09:38 AM »
nope.

ŕiņ

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Re: Insecurities
« Reply #4 on: December 23, 2008, 11:27:48 AM »
Sorry i am unfunny and retarded, i apologize.
 

El the Self Image

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Re: Insecurities
« Reply #5 on: December 23, 2008, 03:05:46 PM »
I agree with the vast majority of what you said....

Although, I am a sales man, I pay my rent by being different people at different times and, unfortunately, this skill has leaked heavily into my personal life....

I have friends that, based on my actual personality type, I shouldn't have.... I'm just so good at playing different roles at different times, and I value the company of people so much, that I've never brought myself to say "Hey, I really don't like you, let's not be friends anymore"..... weird huh???

insecurities.... I got a couple of them, but I'm an intrinsic person and when faced with something I'm insecure about, I usually try to beat it down right then and there, the only one I have never gotten the better of is my weight.... still workin on it....
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ŕiņ

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Re: Insecurities
« Reply #6 on: December 23, 2008, 05:31:37 PM »
What do you sell?
 

El the Self Image

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Re: Insecurities
« Reply #7 on: December 24, 2008, 09:27:47 AM »
Plumbing....

favorite line when I meet a chick at a club, "What up girl? I slang the best domestic pipe this side of Texas, you better get wit it!"

and most plumbers are fucken dicks, so depending on who I'm talkin to, I gotta change my whole persona around.....
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ekmek

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Re: Insecurities
« Reply #8 on: December 24, 2008, 04:50:19 PM »
i find a LOT of people i know/have known start to behave differently when getting serious with a girl. it's almost like they can't be themselves 100% so they present themselves differently to different people. now this might just be in public or whatnot but i think men in general have a lot of INSECURITIES ABOUT THEIR OWN CHARACTERS. they are too scared to show their softer side most of the time and have to over compensate by being too soft when around their women.

i believe in being straight up 100% and not having this character shift when around people of the opposite sex or whatever. you should be comfortable with yourself all the time, no major efforts to go one way or the other and conceal your feelings.

for example i have friends who can look me in the eye and tell me how much they love their girl etc and be completely straight about it and their emotions in general. other people have this macho complex and will refer to their girls physical qualities or whatever. i think you have to be comfortable with who you are deep down - that is generally guys biggest insecurity. another thing that links into that is BEING UNSURE about things. just because you don't have all the answers to life does not make you inferior in any way. guys can tend to have problems keeping an open mind. i would link this to insecurities about character and knowing who you are deep down again.

i think men feel pressured by society to know whats what for themselves and form formulate concrete world views from role models or whatever when in today's world its better to keep an open mind, ask questions of things, learn and grow continuously.

anyone agree with any of that?

i agree
plus i believe its the way people are raised by their families and the images we get by others.
for example:
when girls are raised they are told they must be pretty, that its okay to cry, they must express their feelings ktlp
and for boys their dads tell em u gotta be tough, crying is for pussies, .....
so thats why we got complexes. i have em too :P
 

Chief

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Re: Insecurities
« Reply #9 on: December 29, 2008, 11:14:50 AM »
dude you're a retard

most people are more stable when theyre in a relationship, thats the whole point of 'settling down'
 

El the Self Image

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Re: Insecurities
« Reply #10 on: December 29, 2008, 12:50:56 PM »
dude you're a retard

most people are more stable when theyre in a relationship, thats the whole point of 'settling down'
ummmm..... settling down is for people who have sewn their wild oats and are now, finally, ready to settle down....

And dude, if you're not stable by yourself, then you're not gunna be stable in a relationship.....
do the names Ike & Tina mean anything to you?
NO...?
How 'bout OJ & Nicole?
No...?
Ok, ok, how about K Fedd & Britney...?

point is dude, when two unstable people get together, they don't make each other stable, they make both of their problems worse...
Two wrongs don't make a right....
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Jaydc555

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Re: Insecurities
« Reply #11 on: December 30, 2008, 01:19:26 AM »
I think everyone is guilty of acting different in different crowds.I notice as I get older though its less of a factor.On another note I've seen quite a few people completely sell themselves out just for the person their dating.I've had a couple friends that just changed so much for their girl and it ruined our friendships.I was so worried about this that I sabotaged my last relationship basically because I didn't want friends to think I had changed so I over compensated.I ruined a good relationship because of it
 

Chief

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Re: Insecurities
« Reply #12 on: December 30, 2008, 05:11:34 AM »
dude you're a retard

most people are more stable when theyre in a relationship, thats the whole point of 'settling down'
ummmm..... settling down is for people who have sewn their wild oats and are now, finally, ready to settle down....

And dude, if you're not stable by yourself, then you're not gunna be stable in a relationship.....
do the names Ike & Tina mean anything to you?
NO...?
How 'bout OJ & Nicole?
No...?
Ok, ok, how about K Fedd & Britney...?

point is dude, when two unstable people get together, they don't make each other stable, they make both of their problems worse...
Two wrongs don't make a right....


LOL great examples.

all i knows is that being in a solid relationship creates stability. i'm a menace when i'm single, i am quite chilled out when i have a gf, but at this stage in my life i'm not looking for stability its boring.