i wrote this to black robs whoa....any thoughts?

[J.D. Wykid, Esq.]

i got my clear dunks on smoking clear blunts son.
so ill i need to be locked up in folsom.
this is real life not that family wholesome.
this aint nick at night this is live breaking news.
this is a fist fight but my hammer make ya loose.
one in the brain or 5 in the chest you choose.
body left ooozz with redish hues.
that what happens when you step in the 310.
elivate my flow to a higher plataue.
was ill before now im just whoa.
got a freaky freaky freaky flow.
controll the mic like fidel castro.
like cuba, you might go missin in aruba.
youre luca brasi; you go scuba.
cement on ya feet, now youre  defeat.
king me bitch, im the motherfuking king.
i break necks like wrestling rings.
call that shit "owen hart" --
now yall know what the fuckin im talking about.
i aint out for no bullshit hits, no bullshit trends.
i am unleashing a full on blitz, till this bullshit ends.
the blood in my pen kill you and your friend.
like katrina flood for you its the end.+

feedback? thanks....

[Sanford - V. President of the Dangerous Crew Movement]

that was pretty sick dude!  keep it up!   

[J.D. Wykid, Esq.]

thanks man.