Canibus review: OUCH!!!!

[Don Rizzle]

Artist Name: Canibus
Album Title: C: True Hollywood Stories
Reviewer: DJ LowKey  (y2hipho.com)
Rating: 1.75

In 1997 you couldn't find an emcee hotter than Canibus. His lyrically astonishing performances on various tracks such as "Beasts From The East", "Uni4orm", "4,3,2,1" and "Desperado's" put Canibus on top of the world. You couldn't escape the sounds of Canibus he was literally everywhere. However, we all know the story from here on out. His debut album "Can-I-Bus" was a flop, and didn't deliver the classic experience everyone expected. Bis soon fell out of the spotlight and into obscurity. Many questioned if Canibus could bounce back after such a disappointment. But Canibus answered these questions when he released one of the most slept on albums of the year, "2000 B.C.". The album featured much improved production this time around, which helped Bis get some of his respect back. But even throughout all the drama, one thing was always certain; Canibus was a lyrical demon. You would be hard pressed to find a better emcee out there then Canibus. But that was then, and this is now! A lot can change in a short period of time!

After parting ways with Universal records, Canibus decided to go the independent route with his third release "C: True Hollywood Story", but the result does not end up with a positive result. Many did not know what to expect with Bis's new release since his recent material the past couple of months have been all over the place, but no one expected this! To put it nicely, "C: True Hollywood Story" is a disaster. We do not witness the Canibus we have all grown to love over the years; instead we witness someone who is almost the complete opposite. What happened to Canibus on this album is mind boggling and almost too shocking and utterly horrible to describe. Never before has an emcee done a 360 like this.

The first thing everyone should know is, Canibus is insane! No I am not joking, and after listening to this album you will truly understand what I am talking about. Believe it or not, The whole concept of this album revolves around Canibus' obsession with Eminem. Canibus plays the role of Stan throughout most of the album, yes Stan the suicidal fan who killed himself along with his girlfriend in the classic Eminem tale. The beginning skit "Stan Lives" features Canibus driving behind Stan before he plunges to his apparent death over the bridge, as witness on the real version of the classic tale. However, Canibus dives into the river saving Stan from his death, thus starting a new friendship. This skit leads into the horrendous "U Didn't Care", which is a response to Eminem's "Stan". Canibus raises his voice and dumb downs his lyrics to sound like Stan, the result is laughable to say the least. "What up Em, it's ya biggest fan. Its not even necessary to introduce who I am now cause we good friends. Remember the letter I wrote? Before Atlanta on up in smoke that was the day I was gonna cut ya throat…I promise I won't harass you with any letters saying' shit like we should be together. I meant we should start a crew. The industry is full of homosexuals, Slim but I don't wanna fuck you". Plain and simple, this is one of the worst songs ever recorded. Why would Canibus portray the character of Stan and make a whole song dissing Eminem? Canibus never states why he has beef with Eminem; one can only wonder what is running through his mind.

Staying on the Eminem vibe, "Stan N Can" is a skit where we find Canibus introducing Stan to the Hip-Hop world. Bis decides to put Stan on his team as a fellow emcee, hooks him up with some cloths, ice, etc. Eventually an exuberant Stan pulls out some M&M's to eat, asking Bis if he wants some, only to get the response of "I don't eat M&M's". Two questions come to mind after listening to this skit, what is the point of this skit, and why was it done? The only other time we witness "Stan" is on the lurid "Draft Me". The track sounds like a sequel to "Rip Rock", and we all know how that track turned out. The tracks laughable beat and hook are too bad to describe. "Draft me, I wanna fight for my country, jump in a humv and murder those monkeys". You would think Canibus would have learned his lesson the first time around.

[Don Rizzle]

Besides going at Eminem, Canibus pulls another shocker with the deceivingly titled track "I Gotta Story To Tell". The track isn't really a story at all; instead it is a diss track going at Jay-z, Beanie Siegel and Jadakiss. "Tell your artists to keep my name out their mouth, or you won't have no peace. Compared to Canibus, your pitbulls are poultry. You and Biggie made a dope team, but I roast Beans. So be careful how you approach things. My name ain't J to the muah, man I got a flow that stings". Once again we are left baffled wondering why Canibus is going at The Roc and Kiss. Is Canibus really that crazy that he has to go at every emcee who mentions his name in a track? The track actually ends up as one of the few highlights on the album. But in the end all the track does is put up more questions instead of giving any answers.

However, it does get worse for Canibus. "C:True Hollywood Story" is filled with more horrible tracks than conceivable to anyone's imagination. This train wreck of an album is truly one of the worst ever put out by a respectable artist. Even the biggest Canibus fan has to cringe upon listening. "The Rip Off" is a horrendously produced track that sounds like a cheap rip off of "Buckingham Palace". But unlike its predecessor, Canibus does nothing to help its cause. "So much blood on the floor, you might as well be pretending to be mud wrestling a dozen bitches pmsing, sounds kind of tempting doesn't it". The track is truly horrid thanks to shallow lyrics like this, and the tracks horrible hook, which is a remake of A Tribe Called Quest's "Can I Kick It", which has only been done a thousand times before. Unfortunately it does get worse, yet again. "Hate U 2" and " Luv U 2" both occupy the same beat, which mildly put, is one of the worst ever constructed. The track sounds like a horrible reincarnation of the tetris theme music. The production sounds like it came from a $5 fisher price keyboard or some simple computer generated beat program. Even more tracks that will make you wanna hang yourself are the unbearable "Stop Smokin", "Lemme Hear Somthin Else", "Hot Tonight" and "Gotta Get That Doe". These tracks all suffer from a lack of originality and just plain being corny. Each track is a different step for canibus, pitting him spitting not about his usual barrage of lyrics, instead about women and money. The tracks deal with the same tired old topics that have been used over and over again. After "2000 B.C." many fans criticized Bis for his lack of diversity in subject matter, and labeling him as strictly a battle emcee. Well, Canibus gave the critics what they wanted and put out an album with almost no battle rhymes, but this wasn't what we wanted. Plain and simple, the concepts are immature and put together horribly. Maybe Bis should have stuck with his bread and butter after all.

The final straw is the hideous "Ya Teef Iz Yellow". This skit is too bad to describe. Trying to find the words to describe such immature, straight up crap like this is impossible. The track is truly the worst piece of trash ever to grace this earth. The track is about brushing your teeth! "Ya teef iz yellow, As yellow as some pineapple punch. Ya teef iz yellow. They got that way because u don't brush. Ya teef iz yellow. It's too late for that toothpaste won't be enough. Ya teef iz yellow. You probably got gingivitis in your gums". Someone stop the bleeding!

"C: True Hollywood Story" cant be that bad, but unfortunately it is. The only two remotely enjoyable tracks are the laid back "A Different Vibe In L.A." and the vicious "Boxcutter, Bladerunner". "A Different Vibe In L.A." is a welcomed change for Bis, where he rhymes over a mellow beat and spits about life in Los Angeles. "Boxcutter, Bladerunner" features Bis rhyming ferociously, mixing it up with a fast flow this time around, over a nicely produced track. "Somewhere in Afghanistan, USA survival teams keep an eye on their surroundings in the jihad regime. A total riot scene, back and forth they encrypt fiber optic beams". While both of these tracks may be enjoyable, they are both prime examples of how far Bis has fell in the lyrical department.

The two categories, which most albums are judged by, are production and lyricism, and Canibus fails both of these with flying colors. Believe it or not, the production aspect on "C: True Hollywood Story" is worse than that on his debut album "Can-I-Bus". Combine this with Canibus' attempt at lyricism nowadays and the result is one of the biggest disappointments in recent memory. One thing you never thought would happen is Canibus not delivering lyrically, but that is definitely the case with this release. Bis has fallen so low that not one verse on the album even mirrors that of his old self. It's like night and day, comparing this album lyrically to this previous two. What happened to the man who dazzled us with amazing guest appearances and sick lines like "I walk the streets with heat, three biscuits. Out numbering niggazs twin glocks with triplets".

After listening to "C: True Hollywood Story" you cannot help but feel sorry for Canibus. This album is just plain embarrassing and is going to shatter Bis's career for certain. Even diehard Canibus fans that have supported him since 97 (such as myself) cannot support such an album. "C: True Hollywood Story" is a disgrace to all his fans and all the people who have supported this man through thick and thin. Who would have thought the outcome would warrant this? It is truly a sad sight to see something like this happen to someone with so much talent and potential. Canibus had the potential to be one the greatest this game has ever seen. Instead he will fall into the depths of the unknown, becoming the laughing stock of the industry.

At the end of the album the "C: True Hollywood Story" narrator gives us a classic Canibus line from his glory days in 97. After listening to this, it truly makes you wonder what happened. After spitting nothing but fire for years, Canibus has become just another emcee in a pool of thousands. He has fallen off in every way possible, lyrically, conceptually and especially mentally. Nevertheless, this album is the nail in the coffin. Canibus will never be looked at in the same light again; his career is truly over.

[SugeFight]

The Can-I-Bus album is seriously that bad. That's why I have no respect for a poster on here and claims the album is classic and 5 mic material.

[eNgIeS]

Man i liked the new album.

It is a decent cd, sure it aint a must buy but it aint as bad as they say. I thought A different Vibe In L.A., You Didn't Car, the Box cutter & Draft me were good songs

[Nima - Dubcnn.com]

i think the album is pretty average.. i wanted to buy it but now i wont anymore... damn NO HORSEMEN TRACK!

[teecee]

Yo, i don't know who said the album was 5 mics (my man Cliche gave it  a review and gave it 4.5), but the album is actually far from garbage.  
   Actually listen to the album from front to back, it is a really dope album.   PEACE

P.S._ Check boxcutter and DIfferent Vibe In L.A.

[Cliche]

so... because some website says the album is wack it has to be? that reminds me of when people used to care what the source thought about an album.  i write reviews for a website to.. so now what? I disagree with thier review, I think they're missing the humour and the ingenuity of the album... if it would've been a battle album they would've dissed him just the same for coming with the same shit again.

I'll stand by my 4.5 rating, i could give a shit what anyone else thinks... that's their opinion, i've got my own.

[Don Jacob]

this album isn't a 1/5 mic album


but it IS about a 2-2.5/5 mic album


all the topics are corny
the lyrics arn't whack but they're far from good
the beats are so bad that you can get a 10 year old lil girl to produce better shit


is canibus's career over? probably not, but it's deeply tarnished forever

[RivieraIII]

Poor Canibus. Always knew the kid was an idiot from day 1, despite his treacherous rhyme skills. That's why I NEVER bought his shit. And that's why I'm 200% sure his new album doesn't get more than 2/5. Why? Coz CANIBUS is hands down the MOST STUPID RAPPER ever. Dissin' Em, Jay-Z, Jadakiss, Beanie (basically whoeva was hot when he recorded that shit) after LL and Wyclef, FOR NO FUCKIN' REASON WHATSOEVER is a dumb ass move at best. I CANNOT respect that. I won't be surprised if Canibus disses Kurupt and Ras Kass as soon as they go platinum. Canibus is "finished", like LL said...

[AlerG]

sucks to see bis like this...the album is a total disappointment and a kick in the teeth to all that have been down since day one like me, peace.

[Mighty Whitey]

after listenin to this album all weekend, it's dope.  it's not classic, but it's not like what this reviewer says either. Bis should stick to battle raps, but the way he works Stan into the album was a good idea.

[AlerG]

i totally disagree...that was some trife shit, taken what eminem made famous and branching off of it, peace.

[TheSheriff]

I thought Can-I-Bus was quite well produced.

[M Dogg™]

I thought Can-I-Bus was a very bad clashing in styles, as Canibus didn't fit at all with that album. 2000 B.C. was tight, but it wasn't a made for the charts album. I haven't heard this CD though, and dissing folks is not what you want to do to get famous. It might have bought him a little fame after LL, but I think LL got him, so now it's just counting down 'till it's over. Someone hook this man up with like Nas, or someone with skillz and that knows how to use them, like sent him to a Rakim training camp.

[AlerG]

i don't think ll got the best of him at all though, but the album is still wack though, peace.