One critic's review of THE WASH

[antt213]

The Wash
A Lions Gate Films release of a Lithium Entertainment production. Produced by DJ Pooh, Phillip Atwell, Kip Konwiser. Executive producers, Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg. Co-producer, Jeremiah Samuels. Directed, written by DJ Pooh.

Sean - Dr. Dre
Dee Loc - Snoop Dogg
Mr. Washington - George Wallace
Antoinette - Angell Conwell
Bear - Tommy "Tiny" Lister Jr.
DeWayne - Bruce Bruce
Jimmy - Alex Thomas
Face - Shawn Fonteno
C-Money - Lamont Bentley
Vickey - Shari Watson
Lil' Dee - Arif S. Kinchen
Juan - Demetrius Navarro
Mickey - John Basinger
Ronald - Rashaan Nall
Wayne - Alvin Joiner
Slim - DJ Pooh


By JOE LEYDON
 
Dr. Dre, left, and Snoop Dogg, right, are workers at a car wash owned by George Wallace in Lions Gate's 'The Wash.'



There is something almost infuriating about the cynicism displayed by the makers of "The Wash," a mild and lazy comedy designed for quick play-off in urban markets. Pic, which opened Nov. 14 without press previews, is a sloppy and shoddy piece of work, filled with just about every cliche and caricature common to low-budget, low-brow comedies with predominantly African-American casts. Producers obviously felt they didn't need to provide anything more substantial or original to wring cash from target aud. But spotty B.O. may prove them wrong.
Rapper-actors Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg don't exactly stretch themselves in lead roles as under-achieving roomies who are chronically strapped for cash, but rarely at a loss for good dope and foxy ladies. When Sean (Dre) loses his job at a Foot Locker store, Dee Loc (Dogg) encourages his buddy to join him at a nearby car wash where he works and on the side, sells grass.But when Sean approaches Mr. Washington (comic George Wallace), the wash's gruff owner-operator, for an entry-level job, he winds up being hired as an assistant manager. In this kind of movie, ambition is never a good thing; Sean quickly alienates Dee Loc and his lackadaisical fellow workers by encouraging the guys to do an honest day's work.

Writer-director DJ Pooh ("3 Strikes") doesn't provide much in the way of narrative. "The Wash" unfolds as a series of casually aimless episodes, loosely connected with a slender premise and primarily set in and around the car wash. Pooh got away with a similar sort of shaggy-dog storytelling in his genuinely funny script for "Friday."

Here, however, he cruises on empty. Pic tries to wring laughs from the jivey word-play and broadly comic hijinks of the car wash ensemble. Trouble is, even the actors who manage to make vivid impressions -- Wallace as the blustering Mr. Washington, Angell Conwell as a sexy-ditzy cashier, Tommy "Tiny" Lister as a mild-mannered ex-con -- are limited by one-note roles. Others tend to fade into a blur.

Something like a plot appears in final third of "The Wash," as Mr. Washington is held for ransom by a thick-witted group of kidnappers (including Slim, a dim bulb played by writer-director Pooh). By that point, however, it's too late to do the pic much good. Cameos by Shaquille O'Neal and Tommy Chong don't help, either. But for those who have always wanted to see Pauly Shore tied up and trapped in the trunk of a car -- and you know who you are -- "The Wash" offers at least one good gag.

Tech values would require significant improvement to qualify as second-rate; lensing is especially poor. But wall-to-wall soundtrack of rap and hip-hop singles (including numbers by Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre, of course) will doubtless generate CD sales.

For the record: "The Wash" is neither a remake of, nor a sequel to, "Car Wash" (1976).

from variety.com

[Murrow]

Ouch

[Nima - Dubcnn.com]

damn... they ripped the wash off.. lol but i still think itll be dope! i think they just didnt like rappers acting...

[Big BpG]

The guy seems a little... umm racist...

-Big BpG

[eNgIeS]

The guy seems a little... umm racist...

-Big BpG

Fuck off. Just because someone doesn't like a film doesn't make them racist. I'm sure there are plenty of films that are targetted at a white audience that the black reviewers dont like, does that make them racist?

I'm sick of everyone just assuming that because some white people dont like hip hop that makes them racist. Some blacks dont like Alternative, does that make them racist

No it just means they have different tastes. & to tell you the truth i'm not suprized that The Wash has been getting bad reviews. I think it was a probably a rushed film & like Next Friday was borderline watchable.

Friday was a good film, but looking on as a film critic I wouldnt say it was a CLASSIC.

[Big BpG]

The Wash is a sloppy and shoddy piece of work, filled with just about every cliche and caricature common to low-budget, low-brow comedies with predominantly African-American casts.

Look what he said... he is saying that in a way that makes it seem like white people don't make low budget films...

Engies...... you gotta read the review before you decide to jump on me because I just supplied evidence for my reason for saying that. I read bad reviews all the time and never jump to a racist conclusion... you know what I'm sick of? Ignorant people like you.

-Big BpG

-Big BpG

[infinite59]

As far as the racism thing.  It often is true, that a 'white movie' can get away with being average, more so then a 'black' movie........ and then just look at a movie like Menace to Society, that was an incredible movie, but it got blasted by critics who I believe were racist in calling it 'senseless' violence.  That movie opened doors for me, mentally and spiritually.

Friday is widely renowned as a cult classic, and I agree with those sentiments.  Friday is a much better movie then The Wash........

I saw The Wash yesterday, and if Dre and Snoop hadn't been my idols growing up, I probably would've agreed with this critique of the Wash.  Num sayin..........

[Don Jacob]

Fuck off. Just because someone doesn't like a film doesn't make them racist. I'm sure there are plenty of films that are targetted at a white audience that the black reviewers dont like, does that make them racist?

I'm sick of everyone just assuming that because some white people dont like hip hop that makes them racist. Some blacks dont like Alternative, does that make them racist

No it just means they have different tastes. & to tell you the truth i'm not suprized that The Wash has been getting bad reviews. I think it was a probably a rushed film & like Next Friday was borderline watchable.

Friday was a good film, but looking on as a film critic I wouldnt say it was a CLASSIC.

engies i know your not that nieve  

ALOT (not all) white people DISPISE black culture, and raise the bar ALOT higher for black or minorities for that mannor, of  successful film, if spike lee directed a classic such as hmmmmm the Godfather insted of Fordcopala some critics would say shit like


black director takes the typical route in exploiting organized crime


i took Drama/film appreciation class 2 years straight and Friday is a COMEDY classic, but some white critics are uncompfortable with an all black cast


so engies...stop being so racially nieve, not every white person is compfortable with black culture and some white people are racist at heart weater they know it or not

again engies your VERY nieve to racial issues


and i havn't seen the wash but chances are it's probably not as bad as the critic made it out to be, for one thing the dumb fuck broke a crucial rule of critiquing , this guy was reviewing it as a cinema rather than a comedy  (which is like reviewing an Outkast album like it was a Metallica album)



and yes this guy does seem a bit racist he makes toooooo much of a big deal about it being a black movie

[Sikotic™]

DIdn't they do the same shit with Friday and then the critics lightened up on their review of the sequel since the first was such a success.

And I just wanna say most movie critics piss me the fuck off. Its like they rate movies based on Oscar winners and cinema classics. The Wash is not meant to win an award or be somethin classic. It is just suppose to be a movie to leave you laughin your ass off when you walk out. Some vritics need to go smoke some bud and relax on the real.

[Suga Foot]

I think this review is bullshit.  It's Pavoratti reviewing the chronic.  Of course he won't like it, because he doesn't understand it.  I'm sure the reviewer missed a lot of jokes that a lot of us would get.  However, I haven't seen the film.  It doesn't come out in Vancouver till the 30th.  So we'll see...

[Suga Foot]

It's Pavoratti reviewing the chronic.  

SHOULD SAY:  It's LIKE Pavoratti reviwing the Chronic.

[Nosak]

The guy seems a little... umm racist...

-Big BpG

totally agree, thats why i give a shit about them critics no more... n i think the critics in the source change cause of their new boss.. i don't say he's racist or anything but just that the mag change a bit,, it ain't about black culture n politic ... it about music n ad's. dawm

[Nosak]

i got more shit about the wash....click here

in the review section:

Bottom Line

The Wash is a bit too unstructured and vague but does provide a few good laughs and a talented cast. However, it might be a better bet on video then on the big screen.

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[Trauma-san]

I Do'nt Think He Seems Racist... It IS Kinda True, What He Said, The Movies They Make For The Black Audience A Lot Of Times They Don't Make With Good Plots.  Tell Me That's Not True.  That In Itself Is Almost Racist (the Movie Maker's Mentality That Black People Don't Need A Good Plot).  

Of Course, There Are Tons Of Great Movies Aimed At the Black Audience, But A Lot Of Times, Movies With A Predominantly Black Cast Have Horrible Plots.  I Blame The Producers, For O.K.ing This Stuff.

This Guy Isn't Racist, He's Just Got The Balls To Mention Race In A Review.

[Don Rizzle]

yea i kinda agree alot of films with rappers in n shit tend to have bad acting and little or no plot menace to society was a good film i liked n it had a powerfull plot but not all the acting was great u just need to look at mc eiht's performance.

conclusion most rappers should stick to music rather than jumping on the movie band wagen, although i can see why they do it, they get bored rapping about the same things on the same beats go into a new direction put out a film or whateva