Ay Yo! Wuddup gangstaz, peepz dis y'all

[Mystic_Imperial]

Ay Yo!!!

Hot off da block,
Standin' on da corna'
All da' way around da clock,
Ma free time is ma rhymin' hour,
spittin rhymes be strong,
You knew all ALONG,
Standin in da spotlite,
U be in da dark holdin' mic's WRONG,
Professional in dis rap game,
It takes mattaz of seconds,
before I take Aim,
An' flush yo' fame down da drain,
But even wit' you gone,
Its all da same,
Get yo' whole family scared,
Yo momma can't even complain,
shit,  
Cardiac arrest,
Spin yo nekk around,
like Exorcist,
you possesst',
Join Biggie n' Tu-pac,
up above,
be precise, N' use ma glock,
leave a slug in yo chest',
shit so powa'full,
make yo bitch impresst,
I was born wit dese flowz,
ma fame only growz,
I da Numba one reason,
da bitchz like to expose,
end dis,
holla,

[KVB]

Good in parts... but you'll need to work on that.. most bars didn't even rhyme... and your rhyme is very simplistic... but it's by all means acceptable.

Peace as I proceed to roast a beef.

['Illicit']

Peace as I proceed to roast a beef

what is wrong with you? lol   jus playin


good shit man, keep elevatin, it wasnt bad overall, but like KVB said,  

[doggmastah]

good shit man, keep elevatin, it wasnt bad overall, but like KVB said,  

Same shit!^^

Keep workin' on it!  Peace!

PS: get a smaller pic for avatar so people can see yur rhymes more clearly!