Top 10 "Seinfeld" episodes

[JTSimon]

http://www.xent.com/FoRK-archive/may98/0146.html

Great   Little Jerry

[JTSimon]

The Contest "Master of your Domain"  

Written by: Larry DavidDirected by: Tom CheronesBroadcasted: November 18, 1992 for the first time.Stars: Jerry Seinfeld, Michael Richards, Jason Alexander, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Estelle Harris (as Mrs. Costanza), and Jane Leeves (as Marla).


[Setting: Monk's Coffee shop]

(Jerry and Kramer are sitting opposite Elaine at a booth, eating lunch)



(Jerry and Elaine both laugh at Kramer's impression as George slowly enters. He's in a melancholy state)

KRAMER: Hey, Georgie.

JERRY AND ELAINE: Hi.

(George sits down next to Elaine - opposite Kramer)

JERRY: (To George) What's the matter?

GEORGE: (Slowly shakes his head) My mother caught me.

JERRY: "Caught" you? Doing what?

GEORGE: You know. (All three give him blank stares) I was alone..

ELAINE: (Making a face of surprise) You mean..?!

GEORGE: (Nods) Uh-huh.

KRAMER: (Laughing) She caught you?

(Elaine laughs with Kramer)

JERRY: Where?

GEORGE: (Not really wanting to embellish) ..I stopped by the house to drop the car off, and I went inside for a few minutes.. Nobody was there - they're supposed to be working. (Jerry and Elaine look at each other - enjoying the story) My mother had a Glamour magazine, I started leafing through it..

JERRY: "Glamour"?

(Kramer and Elaine laugh slightly)

GEORGE: ..So, one thing lead to another..

JERRY: So, what did she do?

GEORGE: First she screams, "George, what are you doing?! My God!" And it looked like she was gonna faint - she started clutching the wall, trying to hang onto it.

KRMAER: (Reflecting on the story so far) Man..

GEORGE: I didn't know whether to try and keep her from falling, or zip up.

JERRY: What did you do?

GEORGE: I zipped up!

ELAINE: (Wide-eyed) So, she fell?

GEORGE: Yeah. (Noticing this makes him out to be the bad kid, he gets defensive) Well, I couldn't run over there the way I was!

ELAINE: No, I guess you couldn't have..

JERRY: (In the middle of Elaine's sentence, smiling) No, I wouldn't think so.

ELAINE: (Finishing it off) ..done that.

GEORGE: So, she fell, and then she started screaming, "My back! My back!" So, I picked her up and took her to the hospital.

ELAINE: (Between chuckles) How is she?

GEORGE: (Somewhat angered) She's in traction.

ELAINE: (Still laughing) Ok, I'm sorry.

GEORGE: It's not funny, Elaine.

ELAINE: (Stifling her laughter) I know. I'm sorry. I'm serious.

GEORGE: Her back went out. She's gotta be there for a couple of days. All she said on the way over in the car was, "Why, George, why?!".. I said, "Because it's there!"

(Kramer laughs, sipping his drink)

JERRY: "Glamour"?

(Elaine laughs)

GEORGE: (Vowing) Well, I'll tell you this, though - I am never doing.. that , again.

ELAINE: What, you mean, in your mother's house, or all together?

GEORGE: (Definite) All together.

(The next three lines are said at the exact same time)

ELAINE: Oh, gimme a break..

JERRY: (Skeptical) Ohhh yeah.. right.

KRAMER: Oh, like you're gonna stop?

JERRY AND ELAINE: C'mon..

GEORGE: You don't think I can?

JERRY: No chance.

GEORGE: (Daring) You think you could?

JERRY: Well, I know I could hold out longer than you.

GEORGE: Care to make it interesting?

JERRY: Sure, how much?

GEORGE: A hundred dollars.

JERRY: (Pointing) You're on.

KRAMER: (Butting in) Wait a second, wait a second. Count me in on this. (Clicks his tongue)

JERRY: You?

KRAMER: Yeah.

JERRY: You'll be out before we get the check.

ELAINE: (Smiling) I want to be in on this, too.

GEORGE AND JERRY: (Rejecting) Ohh, no. No, no, no..

ELAINE: Why?

JERRY: (Showing difference) It's apples and oranges..

ELAINE: What? Why? (More 'no, no, no's from Jerry and George. Persistent) Why?

JERRY: Because you're a woman!

ELAINE: So what?

JERRY: It's easier for a woman not to do it than a man.

ELAINE: (Sarcastic) Oh.

JERRY: We have to do it. It's part of our lifestyle. It's like, uh.. shaving.

ELAINE: Oh, that is such bologna. I shave my legs.

KRAMER: (Making a point) Not everyday.

GEORGE: Alright, look, you want to be in?

ELAINE: Yeah!

GEORGE: You gotta give us odds. At least two to one - you gotta put up two-hundred dollars.

KRAMER: No, a thousand!

ELAINE: No, I'll - I'll put up one-fifty.

GEORGE: Alright, you're in for one-fifty.

JERRY: (Nodding) Okay, one-fifty.

GEORGE: Alright, now, how are we gonna monitor this thing?

JERRY: Well, obviously, we all know each other very well, (Elaine slightly laughs) I'm sure that we'll all feel comfortable within the confines of the honor system.

KRAMER: Alright. (Holds out his pinkie at the center of the table)

(Jerry, Elaine, and George all hook their pinkies onto his, in a 'pinkie promise', they all pull their hand away, yelling out "Yeah!")

http://www.stanthecaddy.com/the-contest-script.html

[MANBEARPIG.]

Here is my new and improved top ten(Some names were changed):

10. "The Parking Lot"
  Kramer's friends in the off-broadway production of "Joseph and the Technicolor Dream Coat" let him borrow the dream coat for one night, he then finds a hat and gets arrested for resembling a pimp slapping up a hoe in a parking lot.

09."George and the Sandwich"
 George finds that he is aroused by deli meats and decides to take a pastrami sandwich to bed with him the next time he has sex, then he gets too into the sandwich and leaves the girl behind.

08."The Desk"
  George expands his desk at work so he can sleep after he finishes his work they must destroy the desk after George calls in a fake bomb threat and a few days later they hear ticking his desk because of his alarm clock and assume there is a bomb.

07. "The Rye"
In The Rye, Kramer feeds a horse too much beefarino making him
flatulent, Elaine convinces her saxophone boyfriend to do "everything",
and Jerry mugs an old woman for a marble rye from Schnitzer's so George
can reel it in on a fishing rod. Great moment, George with a rye on
a fishing rod

06. "Helllloooooo!"
  Kramer takes in an assistant and the gang jokes about about jerry's new girl's stomach rumbling at night and pretend to have a conversation with it.
05."Fuscili Jerry"
  the infamous "ASS MAN" episode, it was a one in a million shot doc. ONE-IN-A-MILLION!

04."The Yada Yada"
  George's girlfriend covers up the fact that she lies,
cheats, and steals, by abbreviating all the nasty parts with "yada yada
yada. Jerry is an "anti-dentite", and Kramer and Mickey can't decide
between the two of them who should date which woman.

03."The Party"
  Jerry and Elaine get stranded at a party in Long Island and have to wait for Kramer to pick them up after he loses the directions.  
Woman:"I've lost my Fiancee, I can't believe I've lost my Fiancee, the poor baby"
Elaine: "Maybe a Dingo ate your baby"  
Woman:"What?!"
Elaine:"A Dingo ate your baby!"

02."The Face Painter"
  Jerry, and Kramer get tickets to a Hockey game with Elaine and David Putty and are repulsed by his face painting behavior, jerry does the most DEAD-ON David Putty impression "gotta support the team".

01."The Soup Nazi"
  The soup man makes the gang conform to his rules, or "no soup for you!"






Anythign with David Putty is hilarious, he was the best non important character

[JTSimon]

^lol...I forgot about the episode where George eats a deli sandwich in the bed while having sex.

Oh and the one where George creates an office under his desk at work.


George is my fav character.

[MANBEARPIG.]

^lol...I forgot about the episode where George eats a deli sandwich in the bed while having sex.

Oh and the one where George creates an office under his desk at work.


George is my fav character.

Yea I forgot about those two thats why I cut it down to 5 haha they thought he a had a bomb in his desk because of his ticking alarm clock.

And he couldn't get off withoout eating a pastrami sandwich LMAO.


What was the episode called where they were like "HELLLLLLOOOOOO!" talkiing about Jerry's new girl?


shit looks like I found 10!

[JTSimon]

no clue

maybe this can help  

http://couchpotatotrivia.com/p/seinfeld/episode.asp?season=5

[We Fly High]

haha i was in NYC this past weekend, and got to visit the infamous Soup nazi place. the soup kitchen international. the soup is soooo good.

[white Boy]

i love seinfeld, i have no top 10, i love all of them

[Perfection]

I love they all, except for the ones are before Julia Louis Drefus became a part of the show.

[JTSimon]

I love they all, except for the ones are before Julia Louis Drefus became a part of the show.

http://couchpotatotrivia.com/p/seinfeld/episode.asp?season=1

She was on since season 1.

[Perfection]

I love they all, except for the ones are before Julia Louis Drefus became a part of the show.

http://couchpotatotrivia.com/p/seinfeld/episode.asp?season=1

She was on since season 1.

Not the early episodes of season one, when NBC was thinking of cancelling it. She was brought during Season 1 to help raise the ratings and that she did. Many people believe that Julia did in fact save Seinfled.

[JTSimon]

I love they all, except for the ones are before Julia Louis Drefus became a part of the show.

http://couchpotatotrivia.com/p/seinfeld/episode.asp?season=1

She was on since season 1.

Not the early episodes of season one, when NBC was thinking of cancelling it. She was brought during Season 1 to help raise the ratings and that she did. Many people believe that Julia did in fact save Seinfled.

Oh ok cool...I'm not sure if I have seen those early episodes.

[Lincoln]

The "Ass man" one is the best one IMO.

"I'm Cosmo Kramer, THE ASSMAN!!!"

 

[MANBEARPIG.]

The "Ass man" one is the best one IMO.

"I'm Cosmo Kramer, THE ASSMAN!!!"

 

Man In Car: "HEYYY The ASSMAN'S in town!(honk, honk)"
Kramer: "That's right buddy"

[Lincoln]

The "Ass man" one is the best one IMO.

"I'm Cosmo Kramer, THE ASSMAN!!!"

 

Man In Car: "HEYYY The ASSMAN'S in town!(honk, honk)"
Kramer: "That's right buddy"

LMAO!! Then he does the "Stop & Grab" to George's Mom! Comedy genius.