Tracks that had those lines that just made you laugh.

[Sanford - V. President of the Dangerous Crew Movement]

Too $hort - Way too Real:
http://www.zshare.net/audio/11-way-too-real-mp3-np9.html

I used to fuck a bitch from San Jose
Baby liked to freak all kind of ways
She said I was the best, couldn't settle for less
Had my name "Short Dog" tattooed on her chest
After three months I called it quits
She tried to pop that pregnant shit
But like a mack, I suprised her
Dropped her ass off at Kaiser
Never would I let her put a baby on me
I ain't the one, I'm Step Daddy
I had to let her know just how I feel
I'm living way too real


Eazy E - Nobody Move
http://www.zshare.net/audio/07-nobody-move-mp3.html

But back to the bitches i'm peepin
And then untie the hoe, so i can start creepin
Took her to the backroom, about to jack
Cold trailed the bitch, with a gun in the back
I said: "lay down, and unbutton your bra!"
There was the biggest titties that a nigga ever saw
I said: "damn", then the air got thinner
Only thought in my mind, was goin' up in her
The suspense was makin' me sick
She took her panties down and the bitch had a dick!
I said: "damn", dropped the gat from my hand
[what i thought was a bitch, was nothing but a man]
Put the gat to his legs, all the way up his skirt
Because this is one faggot that i had to hurt, so


 

[Eddie G.]

Goddamn, there's too many

well, all of Too Short - Cocktales

how bout that new Bishop Lamont - Klansmen "Hey what's its like to work with Dr. Dre/Hey faggot, what's it like to be gay"

Too Short - "Sadity" "Tell that bitch I'm Todd Shaw/As I stick my dick in her jaw"

Pimp C  - Let Me See It "When she pop it from the back you see the hairy asshole"

There's probably thousands of em, I'll check back in with more later, those were just from songs I heard in the last 2 days.

[Soulful]

"I'M DA SHIT I SHOULD WALK AROUND WIT PAMPERS ON ME" - lil wayne

[Chad]

A young girl died just last night
She choked on sperm in her windpipe
It was on her face, her neck, and chest
And we're sorry to say there's no suspect
When I saw that my brain clicked
I bust a nut and killed a bitch
 

-Too $hort (Blowjob Betty)

[Z the laidback Virus]

I prefer Suga Free

'I'm Suga Free, I wash my hands BEFORE I touch my dick...'

'the reason she be wearing panties is to keep her ankles warm...'

'remind me to woop your mothafuckin' ass as soon as we get home!'

[westkoastanostra]

"suga free how u wipe yo ass wit them long ass nails/the same way i grow em/ sloooooow as heeeeell" - suga free

[BiG*WiCkEd]

Suga Free:
Bitch said she loved me,
I told her, look up
she did and she got fucked up.

[Al Bundy]

Suga Free is the master:

peep how I struck up
bitch jump in the air stay there until I tell you come down
& when you do you shut the fuck up!
She'll sell a nice dream but
 bitch you'll have better luck tryin' to find 2Pac
than me buying you somethin' off the ice cream truck
Oxygen you leave me 'lone leave me 'lone
before I lock you in that little bitty box again

[Tanjential]

suga free and kokane should do an album together.

anyway

damn....was just about to list a bunch of eminem lines that everyone's probably heard a million times, but yeah dude is hilarious.

suga free is hilarious on sorry i'm away so much "I slapped a bitch and then she snitched but I'll be home" "that's my PO baby, she don't want nothin'. she just want me to pee in this cup."

Mac Dre's 'doing what i do'

It's your nigga g
mac Driggidy
Hey look at me
I'm in the V
Livin free

I can choke a ho
No parole
Get mail
Post bail
and they gone let me go!
I'm here to let you know
this is real as it gets
I'm talkin' hunks and chunks
don't fuck with kibbles and bits


dreezy has alot....will come back to this thread.

You guys remember the hilarious rap interview quotes post from awhile back? Suga Free had a few in there too.
though those are from conversation, not songs.
-T

[Blu Lacez]

Dang..Suga Free is mad funnyy!!!!!!!!!!!!


.."what? you stuck?
hoe, if I tell yo flea to pull a tree
you get a chain and hook his lil ass up..."



"..Suga Free pop a beat and spit a rap so swell.
she said, "suga free, you know anything about cars, honey?"
I said, yeah, you fill em up with hoes
take em to the hoes store
so they can get that money! ..."



.."You the bitch in kindergarten
That got her mouth washed out with soap
Ho I'm a pimp I'm from Pomona I got game I got class
I got sucker-repellent on me homie I'll beat yo ass
I hear you pimpin now, huh? Well ain't that nice
Ain't never sent a prostitute nowhere a day in your life.."


Am sure this line was quoted before..

 "..I sell her dreams to her like a quiet storm
The only reason why baby wears panties, is to keep her ankles from warm.."


Snoop Dogg
.".B*tch threw a dolla at me
i threw it back, now she followin me.."


Goldie Loc,

"The last you brought money,
was when you stole it from your mama, b*tch that s*it ain't funny"


Laced out

[Vinnie]

"Bitch, quit acting like a stuck up clown,
that is why your raggedy ass attitude is fucked up now.
Suga Free,
Bitch swinging on my dick saying weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee."

"He used to be sitting on swole,
but now his ass is thinner than a car antena,
walking down the block with ms. stawberry,
smoking on any and every-thing that will get a nigga blasted.
...
Damn, this nigga must be tweaking, plus I have not seen him all weekend,
but when i do, I am going to break that ass in half with this mother fucking baseball bat (ping)."

"hoes go two ways these days like my pager.
say hoe, my name is J-Ro.
Oh, you did not know?
(No)
well, fuck you then."

J-Ro is easily substitued with Michael, I have used that a time or two.

[Don Mega]

So I went a little closer to see what it was all about
And standin in the crowd
There was my muthafuckin brother butt-naked
Doin the Wop in the intersection
Damn, the shit had his ass so high
After doin the Wop the nigga broke into the Robocop

[Noname]

AMG

She said where ya been, I said in ya mouth

[KURUPTION-81]

AMG

She said where ya been, I said in ya mouth

Lol

Suga Free - This is as touching as a butterfly landing on little retarded kids hand.

i dont know why but that image always makes me laugh........................damn im going to hell.

[Tanjential]

AMG

She said where ya been, I said in ya mouth

Lol

Suga Free - This is as touching as a butterfly landing on little retarded kids hand.

i dont know why but that image always makes me laugh........................damn im going to hell.

BRilliant.

-T