finally, my farewell message

[mellowman]

first up, I only want the people who are familiar with me or my posts to read this farewell. if you never read one of my posts there really is no reason to read my farewell message. however, please feel free to read my other post  that i will post after this one regarding the current status of dre and aftermath. now, on to my farewell. i am not back here on a permanent basis and i am not here because i need attention again. i am here to finally deliver on a promise i made many months ago. when i left this board many months ago i left without giving you a full explanation of why i was leaving. but once i left for a week I just basically decided to let it go and never post here again. however, i gave people my word that i would give you an explanation with a farewell post. and its been bothering me lately that i never fulfilled my promise. therefore i am back one final time because if i didn’t come back it would continue to bother me for a long time. towards the end of my stay i allowed myself to get into some stupid beefs and fights with some people on this board. therefore, when i left it was on a pretty negative vibe and that bothered me a lot too. therefore i  want to apologize to everyone on this board, especially the few i got into beefs with, for my actions. no matter how hurtful or ignorant some of the words and accusations were towards me and against me i should have never responded back. hopefully this last post here today will end things on a more positive note. and this post is definetly the end. it seems like yesterday when i was asked by a certain person to check out the dre2001.com board. i’d used computers for making music, but never for internet access, so it took me a minute to figure it out. once i did i posted on that board a few times. most of my posts were simply to defend dre against a lot of hate and lies directed towards him. while i was there i “met” a few of you and quickly admired your love and knowledge for Dre and the west coast hip hop scene. eventually the dre2001 board was infiltrated by ignorance and lack of knowledge, so i bounced for good. a few months later i was asked to check the site again to see if it was worth keeping up. while i was there i saw a post about this new forum from one of the names i recognized. so i checked it out and saw many names i recognized. a few weeks later i posted a thread about dre’s upcoming projects and collabs, and the rest is history. from day one I told myself that if my participation on this board ever became more about me than the music i would leave. however, as soon as i allowed my close affiliation with dre/aftermath to slip, that would become impossible. once i crossed that line i couldn’t turn back. i make no excuses in life, so I take full responsibility for my actions and the consequences that are the result of my actions. therefore i take full responsibilty for allowing myself to be opened up to doubt, criticism, accusations of lying, and personal attacks on me. As you know I responded to those things many times, even though i knew i shouldn’t. so looking back i regret that i did. i should have let it go and disregarded those type of comments, and focused strictly on the music. but i didn’t do that so i apologize. I know if I was in your shoes I would have raised some questions in my mind and experienced some doubt about “mellowman” too. I never expected everyone to believe me, nor did i care. I posted on this board to give you insights you couldn’t get anywhere else and news you wouldn’t hear about for weeks or months later. Why did I pick your forum to post? it was just luck of the draw or maybe even fate that this was the one forum i checked out. i have never looked anywhere else, nor will i ever. I posted on this board because i wanted to, not because i had to. i didn’t participate on this board for recognition, money or anything. and i never once asked for anything in return. because as I see it you owe me nothing, and i/we owe you, the fans, everything. The only thing i want you guys to do for me is to spread and defend the truth - spread the insights and truth i gave you on threads like “creation of a dre track” and “the best there ever was and ever will be”. do what you can to make the non-believers believe. THIS POST WILL BE CONTINUED SO PLEASE REFRAIN FROM COMMENTS UNTIL I AM DONE. THANKS.

[mellowman]

Who am I? I give you my word that i am a close associate of dre and part of the aftermath family. But i will not reveal who i am. why? for one it would defeat my purpose and reasons for being here. it would also be arrogant and selfish of me to do so. also i doubt you’d believe me. i don’t think you can even realize or fathom how close you were to dre. the main reason i won’t tell you is because dre puts incredible faith and confidence in me. i gave him my word that i wouldn’t betray his trust. i have too much respect for dre to betray that trust. thats why i never released any info that should not have been passed on. i know many personal and private things about some of your favorite artists and i know a ton of behind the scenes stuff that will never be revealed because me and others have agreed not to ever discuss it.  i would have never done it anyhow because i refuse to ever do anything that might hurt my friends or interfere with about something that is private and personal. i have given you some clues along the way as to my identity, but not nearly enough to ever pinpoint me or back me into a corner. i’m not going to spend much time defending my credibility. however, if you look at every single one of my 150 posts and the dates of those posts you will notice that i announced a lot of news way before anyone else could have possible known. but i never bragged about it or stroked my ego by announcing things as EXCLUSIVE NEWS!!!! to get attention. i dropped a lot of nuggets quietly that you might have missed if you didn’t read all of my posts or read my post all the way through.  I dropped some release dates and titles way before anyone else, i announced some collabs way before anyone else,  i annouced additional producers on projects such as Truth Hurts months before it was announced anywhere else. i told you what certain tracks would sound like months before they could have possibly been leaked. i gave you insights and knowledgable perspectives only people close to dre would know. the proof is in my posts. i stand by my word and the content of my posts. if you asked people who were on this board before i arrived or shortly after i arrived they would tell you I speak the truth and that i am the real deal. but in the end all i have is my words and my integrity, so whether you choosed to believe me or not is up to you. it is out of my hands. why am i leaving? there are a few reasons. one of them IS NOT that someone exposed me. however if someone wants to believe they did, go ahead. i don’t give a fuck.  it seemed to me like a lot of people thought I was leaving because a few people were doubting me so much. but that was and is not the reason. i would never allow an outsider sitting behind a computer push me away. i am leaving for personal reasons. it has nothing to do with this board or any member of it. a majority of you are good people. i respect and admire your knowledge and your love of music. i hope i treated people with respect. yes there were some people who did not treat me with respect that needed some strong words, but it was never to be taken personally. if any of you ever thought i crossed that line I strongly apologize to you. I appreciate all of you who supported, defended and appreciate me during my stay on this board. i thank you from the bottom of my heart. i wanted to send some of you some personal farewell messages, but since i couldn’t possibly contact all of the people i wanted to, i didn’t. so please forgive me if i missed you. i am honored to have been a part of this board. THIS POST WILL BE CONTINUED ONE MORE TIME. AGAIN, PLEASE REFRAIN FROM ANY COMMENTS UNTIL I AM DONE. THANKS.

[mellowman]

So what is the reason i’m leaving? from the beginning i never intended to stay even this long. last august i really started to think of leaving. then after september 11th I had to step back and really rethink what was really important in my life. i did some deep soul seaching and once i determined what was important i had to commit myself to focus on those things.  I decided that family, loved ones, music and my faith were the only things that truly mattered in my life. to refocus on these things i had to filter out things that were taking precious time away from where i needed to be. this board was one of the many things that had to be greatly reduced or eliminated. i spend a lot of time making music, so the rest of my time has to be spent with the people i love. i have come from virtually nothing by working extremely hard. i’ve lived most of my life without computers, the internet, satellite tv and unnecessary material possesions like jewelry - so i know for i fact i don’t need them to survive. they just take time away from actually living life. this is why i won’t come here again. the only time i’ll use computers is in the studio to make music. when it comes to computers i am an expert is using pro tools but nothing else. the last time i was on the internet was last year when i last posted on this board. and this will probably be my last visit to the internet for a year or more. (in fact to do this post i had to go to a place so funny that you guys would laugh uncontrollably if you knew where i was at. this place charges me to be online so i had to type everything out before i logged on. thats why i can do my follow up so fast) I dont use the e-mail because every one that i care about knows where to find me. the other reason for leaving is because i was truly tired of the focus being on me. i don’t like to talk about myself.  i feel selfish every time i do it, including this time. i’m also worried that i would eventually come across as an arrogant, holier than thou know it all. anyone who knows me knows that i am not like that at all, but i know it can come across that way over the computer sometimes. although i can deal with the spotlight i’d much rather stay behind the scenes. i would rather help others get the recognition and spotlight. i don’t care about or need recognition, awards, praise or accolades. i don’t care about most of the materialistic bling bling bullshit out there. and since i came from not having money, money doesn’t run my life in any way. i’m not gonna be a hypocrite and say that i don’t like having a nice car, a nice house, my own pool and my own music and movie theatre. of course i enjoy those things. but if they were taken away from me tommorrow i could easily live a comfortable and enjoyable life with my loved ones. i don’t make music for any reason except my love for it. music is the blood that runs through my heart and the passion that lives in my soul. i am incredibly blessed to be able to do what i love to do for a living. music isn’t a job, its my life. and being able to work with a legend like dre is undescribable. it’s an incredible honor and something i will forever be proud of. i came to this board as a mystery and i am leaving a mystery, and thats just how i wanted it. i enjoyed my time here but its time to go. before i leave i urge all of you take a step back and look at your life, your goals and your dreams. find your passion and make that what you do for a living. and every once in a while, if not for good, unplug the computer or the tv and go live and experience life. life isn’t about downloading songs on a computer or watching TV. and life isn’t about you. its about the people you love. life is about working hard and enjoying every day to the fullest with your loved ones. i know that tommorrow is not promised to me or anyone. i have to make sure i live life like every day is my last. keep an open mind to music, people and everything else in life. tommorrow go do something you’ve never done before. and always, ALWAYS tell the people that you love, that you love them, every single day. the two things i want you to take away from me is this. one, music is the personal soundtrack to each person’s life. don’t make fun of or criticize anyone for the music they listen to. that’s the beauty of music. if you think something sucks fine, but don’t try to push your views on anyone else. if you don’t like it shut your mouth, move on, and go listen to the music that you love.  the second thing i want you to take from this board is to realize that Dr. Dre is no fluke. everything he has ever gotten he has earned. the reason he is the best is that he works harder that anyone else.on top of that he is a true genius. dre is a once in a lifetime producer, just like Jordan is a once in a lifetime athlete. never forget dre’s legendary music and talent. good luck to all of you in your lives. i wish you the best of things in life. dream big and work hard to acheive those dreams. now its time for me to take myself and my long ass posts and disappear into the abyss. While you will never  hear from me again, i promise you all that you all will “hear” me again. now for the last time i wish you PEACE AND FUNK ’ALL............ALL Y’ALL.

[engelwood]

Thanks Mellow, and good luck to anyting and everything you come in contact with in the future! You will be missed.  


-Engelwood

[Now_Im_Not_Banned]

*speechless*

[Dope Money Clean]

Much Love .  Those were some wise words .        I  saved  your post about    Dre   "Best there was  , best there ever will be" .    I like  readin that   piece from time to time .   Its really  inspiring .        

The   "exclusive news"   "updates"      didnt  mean shit to me .    I  enjoyed  your info  on  the  behind the scenes  stuff .   It  was amazing readin how  a  Dre beat is  made .  Those are the things that will stay in my mind  forever  , and most people will never know about that ........ so thanx  ALOT   for sharin  the info .    I saved alot of your posts   .    

Anyway  ,      stay  blessed and keep    havin     fun with   your career   .      

[HBKid_Jr]

good luck in future wit music an life,  sucks to see u finally go man

[West Coast Veteran]

Damn we are losing all the great posters on this forum. Farewell homie and take care.

[Dogg_Pound_Gangsta]

wow mellow u made me look at life in a whole different way.  i think that ima stop usin computer and shit and live life to the fullest.  thanks for the inspiring words dogg.  i always loved ur posts.  that exclusive news bullshit neva sticks to me but ur posts did.  lata homie!!!!!

[Nima - Dubcnn.com]

Much Love .  Those were some wise words .        I  saved  your post about    Dre   "Best there was  , best there ever will be" .    I like  readin that   piece from time to time .   Its really  inspiring .        

The   "exclusive news"   "updates"      didnt  mean shit to me .    I  enjoyed  your info  on  the  behind the scenes  stuff .   It  was amazing readin how  a  Dre beat is  made .  Those are the things that will stay in my mind  forever  , and most people will never know about that ........ so thanx  ALOT   for sharin  the info .    I saved alot of your posts   .    

Anyway  ,      stay  blessed and keep    havin     fun with   your career   .      

word

[Suga Foot]

Mel you're a good person.  It's sad to see you go.  I always enjoyed and looked forward to your posts.  This post made me think a lot about myself and the life I am living, and I realized that my life may need some changes too.  I wish you and the whole Aftermath camp the best of luck in the future.  And once again I wanna say thank you.

[Rud]

Damn...

Thanks For Returnin To Make Your Farewell Thread - The People Who Matter Was Wondering If You'd Come Back

Words Of Wisdom Like That Dont Show Up Everyday - Im Sure Most People Will Take Them On Board.

I Dont Know Who You Are Nor Do I Care - Your Posts Over Time Have Said All I Need To Know. Idendity Isnt Important.

Its A Shame You Have To Go But As The Saying Goes

"All Good Things Must Come To An End"

Thanks For Everything


peace

Rud

[ExZit]

keep it cool Mellowman and goodluck!

i promise you all that you all will “hear” me again

ohh.. cool...maybe u will come back..

[Rud]

ohh.. cool...maybe u will come back..

ExZit - In The Musical Form!  

[Murrow]

Dam, this shit ame outta left field.  Peace Mellowman, thanks for the knowledge.

LoL, I'm in the ATL now, be home very soon.