It's May 14, 2024, 08:29:54 PM
I lurked a bit at sohh but for the most part im still just getting to be familar with posters and history.Used to post on the old deathrow and dpg recordz forums,then dubcc. Jaydc for anyone from dubb.This place though, I feel at home. Ive never laughed as much as i do here.Im not looking for daps or rep,just wanted to say i appreciate all yall.Truth be told i been going through some **** and the comedy of this place brightens my day.Love yall.
Well i dont want to make it that kinda thread but the last year of my life has been hard.My fam,i love them. But they all addicts and users. I made the decision to cut them out of my life. Its hard. I was laid off, evicted,homless,betrayed by my best friend and gf,struggled with addiction and depression Life brought me to my knees.
Thanks brehs,you dont know how much that means to me. Bk I see you.Truth be told I made this thread with two gs of white in me.....addiction man. It helps my pain but brings more.I was gonna ignore that i made this thread but you know what, imma tell my story. Dont care if anyone reads this I just need to let go,one time.I grew up poor. My father was a junkie and a con. He taught how to steal,get high and violence. I was 11 when he murdered a woman,mother of three. I found out about in the news. I remember being in court seeing her family. **** tore me up.I got three siblings all different dads. Fam never accepted me. Always an outcast .I turned to drugs,some nights trying to die. Had nights were Id do 15 caps of e and 4 grams of white.Started slanging,robbin. Moved on my own at 16.Anyway last year I rent a house with my brother and gf. Working legit. Get my license suspended so i lose my job. Two days later get evicted cuz my bro isnt paying rent. Landlord keeps my 800 deposit. Now i got no job
nowhere to live. My sister says move out of state to her,her bf can get me a job . I agree,i go to sell my furniture,my bro wants to buy it. Last day he says he has no money . So I have to give it all away . Then my gf of four years reveals her n my best friend of 20 years are fucking.Day i go to move sister says her n bf broke up . Nowhere to go but moms. After three days her n bf says i'm using them n kick me out . Also say i owe them my 60 plasma for rent. I snapped n smashed the tv with my bare hands . Im homeless .
Ive never been religious or spiritual but I have started reading buddhism and it helps. Truth be told ive always just held everything in.
Damn brehs,thank you. I mean that with every ounce of my fucking heart. I tried writing a reply to the responses a few times but I kept breaking down in tears at some of the words in here.Imma take the time to respond to each of you. But im saving this thread,and reading all your words. This thread may save my life and i dont say that lightly. Its nice to know people care.Got me crying again.
Back in high school i was english honors, used to write poetry. It helped. Imma write one tonight and post it on here.
Music keeps me sane. Its funny, joe budden gets a lot of hate,but i swear his music saved my life. If you never suffered from depression joe aint for you. But i listen to his words and it lifts me.
**** brehs.....im hitting a low point again..i got back on my feet got my own place and job. And in the same week a few weeks ago the company laid off 90 percent of the staff including me and my place was robbed. Lost pretty much everything I had.feels like im fucking cursed man. I try to be a good person but sometimes I gotta do dirt just to get by. And it just weighs my conscious down.im having a relapse on coke again. All day I think about suicide I just dont feel like im strong enough anymore. All I fucking know is pain. I need fuckin help im so fuckin lost
gaydc is a lowlife, i was right
Well damn that sucks.If you're broke and depressed doing cocaine is probably the worst possible choice one can make, it will make you even more depressed and costs over twice the price of gold. But its his choice to make and none of my goddamn business. Keep your head up Jay.
Quote from: run-of-the-millian on June 23, 2013, 03:39:30 AMWell damn that sucks.If you're broke and depressed doing cocaine is probably the worst possible choice one can make, it will make you even more depressed and costs over twice the price of gold. But its his choice to make and none of my goddamn business. Keep your head up Jay.real spit....but jaydc was the typa cat who would try and clown cats who made posts like these....i always told him, shit catches up, sooner or later. hope he's doin better, cuz his last post was talkin bout suicide
Quote from: NIKCC on June 23, 2013, 11:56:17 AMQuote from: run-of-the-millian on June 23, 2013, 03:39:30 AMWell damn that sucks.If you're broke and depressed doing cocaine is probably the worst possible choice one can make, it will make you even more depressed and costs over twice the price of gold. But its his choice to make and none of my goddamn business. Keep your head up Jay.real spit....but jaydc was the typa cat who would try and clown cats who made posts like these....i always told him, shit catches up, sooner or later. hope he's doin better, cuz his last post was talkin bout suicide yeah that's exactly my sentiment. I wish him to get back on track. but jaydc would always clown, diss "weaker" people. he acted like he knew better than most and patronized other members. he would also go on angry rants. and he was a known troll as well. kinda like Tom and Blasphemy too, who, coincidentally, have had suicidal tendencies too if I'm not mistaken....i was wondering what jaydc had become, i would have never thought reading this one day
Quote from: bouli77 on June 23, 2013, 12:16:21 PMQuote from: NIKCC on June 23, 2013, 11:56:17 AMQuote from: run-of-the-millian on June 23, 2013, 03:39:30 AMWell damn that sucks.If you're broke and depressed doing cocaine is probably the worst possible choice one can make, it will make you even more depressed and costs over twice the price of gold. But its his choice to make and none of my goddamn business. Keep your head up Jay.real spit....but jaydc was the typa cat who would try and clown cats who made posts like these....i always told him, shit catches up, sooner or later. hope he's doin better, cuz his last post was talkin bout suicide yeah that's exactly my sentiment. I wish him to get back on track. but jaydc would always clown, diss "weaker" people. he acted like he knew better than most and patronized other members. he would also go on angry rants. and he was a known troll as well. kinda like Tom and Blasphemy too, who, coincidentally, have had suicidal tendencies too if I'm not mistaken....i was wondering what jaydc had become, i would have never thought reading this one dayTom and Blasphemy? Where you got that from?true. I hope things get better for him, but the way he acted on here was often despicable. He really was a troll and jumped at other people all the time. And he always pretended to be a winner and stuff. I vaguely remember that he claimed to own (or work in) a shop for outdoor stuff. Also, do you guys remember him postin about being on a yacht and living the high life? jus sayinOne question, is there a connection between da sauce and this colli forum? I wondered because they have the same 'smilies'
it just proves what i was sayin all along...it's usually people with inner pain who lash out at others like that. i just never knew how bad it actually was.
i can't tell if he's for real or trolling
Quote from: NIKCC on June 23, 2013, 12:48:04 PMit just proves what i was sayin all along...it's usually people with inner pain who lash out at others like that. i just never knew how bad it actually was.So what's yours? Eden being gay? You being jobless? Still sweatin' you and Natalie breaking up? Combo of all three?Open up to the forum. Be heard, Brotha.